Rejected

Wednesday:

I'm feeling a bit cranky because I am still sick. Two weeks now! It is affecting my exam confidence. Five exams next week to study for. I was quite a lot better yesterday but this morning woke up with throat really sore again, aching legs, headache, fatigue, all as bad as ever. Frustrating. At least Jasmine has recovered from her relapse.

It's hard to know if stopping Duromine has had any physical effect because I'm feeling rotten anyway, it may be the cause of the upset tummy. Or not. But one I'm sure of is that the night sweats have immediately returned with a vengeance as they have every time I've stopped taking the tablets for a day or two. How many years does peri-menopause take? It's been at least... I'm not sure... four years so far? Maybe longer. At least four. Last night's accompanying stupid dream was about realising I'd left my school uniform by a swimming pool, on the other side of a shopping complex, and sending Aiden to get it but knowing he wouldn't be able to find it and that I was going to be late for school... We do wear uniforms all through our school life in Australia but not as an adult at a tertiary institution!

Thursday:

Dragged myself around TAFE today because it was the last week before exams and I didn’t want to miss last minute info, and we also had a timetabling session for next year. Sore throat and tired and horrible headache all day, even with Panadol. And then I got a call from the Intership people, I didn’t get it (Lauren did). I didn’t even think they were deciding yet, but clearly they did. A bit relieved because I don’t think I would have been able to work with the times they wanted, but mostly disappointed.

Slept in train on way home, and at home in front of TV. Most of my life sleeping atm.

Another uniform

Wednesday:

Today was Jasmine's turn to get her winter school uniform, so I drove her to school instead of her taking the bus (too far to walk). She is short (like me) and the trousers were way too long! The lady said they shrink up a bit in the wash so not cut them straight away - or at all - she suggested something called Magic Tape to fold up the bottoms until Jas grew a bit then they could last years.

There was an embarrassing moment at the end. I also bought Jas a school jacket and she wanted to wear it today so the lady gave me a permanent market and I wrote her name on the label - and only then realised I'd been given the wrong item! It was the other lady's fault but now I'd written my daughter's name on the tag in permanent marker. She changed it for the correct item immediately and I checked very carefully this time before I wrote in it, but felt a bit embarrassed that they now had an unsalable jumper. I suppose they could put it on the second-hand rack and sell it at a discount.

All my energy from yesterday seems to have fled. I edited in the morning, then listened to a Headspace meditation after lunch and dozed off, then felt groggy for the rest of the afternoon. Very glad Wednesdays don't have any after-school activities.