Diamond Beach

We just got home from a week at Diamond Beach, about four hours north of Sydney and 15 mins drive from the coastal town of Forster.

We stayed in a cabin a couple of hundred metres from the beach. We didn't have much of a view due to a rise in the ground and some windswept bushes, but we could hear the waves pounding constantly. The weather was perfect, high 20s every day. We were careful to stay out of the sun in the middle of the day and used lots of sunscreen, but Jasmine still got a bit burned on a couple of days.

We strolled up and down the beach and did a couple of costal walks in the morning or evening - still very hot! This was a very steep climb up a hill then up a tower to get this view back towards Forster. My legs were fit enough for it, but it was very humid and I found it hard to get enough oxygen. Mosquitos in abundance. While Jas and I walked back down at a leisurely pace, Tim and Aiden sprinted down then back up and down again! So we all ended up equally hot and sweaty (except Jas).

We saw lots of crabs on the beach (and a huge dead stinky turtle) and pelicans and dolphins in the estuary (here you see a dolphin fin behind a pelican). Forster lies between the ocean and a series of lakes.

The pool was nice, though not as nice as ours. We've been there a couple of times before and it was always great for little kids as it's pretty shallow. Jasmine is doing a handstand.

Tim brought the kite I gave him for Christmas. The first try on the beach was hilarious, it would instantly nosedive. I had a go and got very wet running through a wave trying to get it flying. Not enough wind I think. A couple of days later it flew well on the bit of ground between our cabin and the beach.

A big feature of the holiday was eating out for every lunch and dinner. For dinner we always went somewhere elegant in Forster, and usually for lunch as well or else a nice pub closer by. The food was nearly all tasty, but I missed my own cooking by the end. All laden with fat, salt, sugar and carbs. I'd feel bloated and sleepy after meals and my weight is up a couple of kgs.

I enjoy holidays but I love being home again, especially my own bed!

Oompah

Saturday:

It was my brother-in-law’s 40th birthday party today, he chose to celebrate in a German restaurant in the city. There were Octoberfest celebrations so it was... exuberant. Three and a half hours of loud oompah music, sauerkraut and pork belly. I didn’t eat that much actually, there’s only so much pork fat a girl can handle. It seemed odd to go all the way into the city (not fun for Tim who has to commute every day) when there is a restaurant with exactly the same menu nearby, that we went to on his birthday last year, and my throat is really sore from trying to talk to people over the noise of the crowd and the music. And a very long time for the little kids to sit and be good. But it was Nick’s choice and I think he had fun.

I’ve been eating the four slices of bread every day (and enjoying it!) and for the first time in ages I haven’t had any abdominal pain! Bit soon to tell, but that seems like it’s not the gluten causing my pain. I have had mouth ulcers, but they have flared up immediately after eating chocolate not bread. So... sugar, like I’ve always thought? Don’t know.

Aiden was home sick Monday and Tuesday, Jasmine on Friday. She still wasn’t feeling great today, but sat through the party and all the travel We have plans for tomorrow, but we’ll see how she is. I’m not going to put her through another long day.

Port Macquarie

Monday:

I think I'll save this morning's weigh-in until the end...

We spent last week at Port Macquarie on holiday. We hadn't been there before, but had to find something at short notice as we weren't sure which week Tim could take off work and our usual places were booked out. Actually we haven't been away longer than a weekend since moving to Sydney nearly three years ago! Installing the pool took all our money and attention. Port Macquarie is four and a half hours away (plus stops for lunch etc), north of Sydney, just far enough that it doesn't book out as quickly as the closer tourist spots. Population of about 45,000. It was lovely! We were so lucky with the weather too, 23C nearly every day - in the middle of winter! - clear and sunny.

Sorry a lot of the photos are so glary, the sun was so bright! The beaches were really interesting, lovely golden sand with outcroppings of sculptural rocks.

On the first day we went for a long walk, two and a half hours (there and back) along the beaches and through little sections of bushland. We could see the spouting and splashing of whales not too far out. We got as far as the rainforest café but I was too tired to face the rainforest walk, we had lunch and walked back. I was exhausted!

The kids and Tim collected 'staves of power' - walking sticks that they retained for the whole holiday. I think there was the Staff of Awesomeness, the Staff of Light and Dark, and the Staff of Art. I had a 'poking stick' on the first day but preferred to walk unencumbered.

The kids had a dip in the hotel's heated pool in the afternoon - very brave of them as 'heated' barely took the chill off. There were plenty of other children in with them. The adults wisely all sat in deck chairs and stayed warm.

There were several restaurants within walk of the hotel or else we drove five minutes into town. The food was really good everywhere, hardly a disappointing meal. I had dessert most nights but usually shared with Jasmine. We bought some supplies and had breakfast in our rooms most days. Also plenty of snacks - like the Haagen-Dazs ice cream!

On the second day we drove back to the rainforest area and walked around the 1.3 km raised boardwalk, it wasn't very inspiring. Just scrubby Australian bushland in winter. We weren't far enough north for the pretty stuff. We went into town for lunch and walked along the shoreline, there was a long series of rocks painted by locals and/or tourists - often recording visits to the area. One had dates every year back to 1993.

Later the kids played on the beach opposite our hotel, sandcastles and gymnastics and paddling freezing feet in the ocean. I perched on one of the rocks and enjoyed the fresh sea air.

The third day started cloudy so we went to mini golf - the clouds cleared pretty quickly and I wished I'd taken my hat! Another bright sunny day.

I had slept really well the first night but then had two bad nights so had an awful headache. Tim thought it might be withdrawal (from Duromine/phentermine) but that didn't seem likely to me since it had been more than a week since I'd taken any. Wouldn't withdrawal happen sooner? I slept fine after that so it was only one bad/grumpy day. 

More beach play in the afternoon, and into town for dinner where we found this wall. My angel daughter:

Saturday was the only colder day, max of about 17C. In the chilly morning we had a good walk along the shore in town, and went to the two (very small) local art galleries. Many buildings had these weird graffitied koala statues in front of them - the rainforest walk had several. I checked the website and there are 62 in all, every one painted differently by a local artist as a sculpture project to celebrate the iconic Australian animal.

We thought about going horse riding, or to a movie, but ended up deciding to go whale watching in a boat. In terms of seeing whales up close, it was amazing. We zoomed out to where two 10-metre long humpback whales were dawdling along, they head north this time of year to warmer waters to have their babies before heading back to the chilly south for better feeding. One did some lovely water dancing for us.

Well, actually all the splashing was not for our benefit. The guide explained that all the breaching and tail slapping is by the females to summon the males. And it worked! In about 20 minutes we had six or seven arrive, with dolphins who apparently like to ride the bow waves in front of the whale's snouts (noses?), jostling for position. They were all around and under the boat. 

Unfortunately by that point Jasmine and I were in no position to enjoy or even watch what was going on. The sea wasn't particularly rough but it was a small boat (12 passengers) which rolled and yawed a lot as we putted along keeping alongside the whales, so by then Jasmine and I were both miserable with seasickness and making use of the bags provided. Urg. At least I had been ok for the first bit, I think poor Jasmine was slightly queasy right from the start and it just got worse and worse. She never got out of her seat. The last half hour was horrible for us both. 

Also it was freezing cold out on the open water, even in the heavy waterproof ponchos provided, and I was terrified when we were going fast to and from the whale area (I am not good with speed or heights/depths) especially when the driver put in a few extra zips and curves for fun. So overall I was very glad to get back to land! I felt ok as soon as my legs stopped trembling. At least Tim and Aiden had a great time. And we certainly saw some whales!

On our final morning we had breakfast at a café right on our beach.

Then we went back to a little tea shop where I'd fallen in love with this cute set the day before - you can't tell in the photo but it is impractically tiny - the teapot probably holds one normal cup full and the six cups each hold a mouthful! But fun for sipping the choc-mint tea we bought there. I just had to have it. There is a teeny goldfish in the bottom of each cup, revealed as you drink. I plan to bring it out as a joke, next time I serve visitors cups of tea. Or they might be a good size for nuts, blueberries or other small foods.

Finally the long drive home. It was a great holiday, but I do love home! And my own bed.

Tim is back at work today, the kids return to school tomorrow.

So this morning I weighed 73.2 kg - up 1.7 kg from last week. No surprise there! I did a lot of eating over the past week. Lots of walking, too, but not enough to offset the calories. I'm back on Duromine today, hopefully the break of over a week will help trigger a reset so it works for me again.

I received my TAFE transcript in the mail, it's not my actual Diploma but it says I've passed everything (which I knew of course) so at least I have proof I can show potential employers. Still hoping to hear from that 'perfect job' this week and get an interview.

Birthday dinner

Saturday:

I did an hour of sweaty dance exercise this morning - and was tired the rest of the day! But I’m glad I got my body moving. I planned to do half an hour, but I was trying to get five stars in a new song and I couldn’t give up until I got it. I was so close every time - six or seven attempts in a row! I kept thinking I’d get those extra points next try.

It will be my birthday on Monday, so we went out to dinner with the family tonight. The Mediterranean food was really nice, and Ping brought a lovely chocolate cake. But a gift bag with a bottle of Limoncello (lemon liquor, I don’t know why people keep giving me alcohol I hardly ever drink!) got knocked over on the tile floor. I didn’t realise it was broken until I saw the liquid gushing out all over the floor. Both slippery and sticky! The wait-staff mopped it up for me, and took away the bag of broken glass.

I wore a special-occasion winter dress that I’ve only worn two or three times since I bought it about five years ago, but I think it might need to be retired. It was a bit loose and kept slipping off my shoulders. It’s funny how the clothes I thought most flattering when I was bigger now don’t make me look so good! But it’s all relative - I still look better now in a baggy dress than I did then in a well-fitting dress. I like being thinner!

Centarian

Sunday:

Yesterday was my Poppa's 100th birthday. (My mother's father.) A celebratory lunch was held at a country club, all the extended family from near and far plus family friends. I enjoyed catching up with family, but all these older people kept coming up to me and knowing who I was but I had no idea who they were! Darryl? Um, maybe Poppa's cousin's daughter? Or lived next door to Poppa when I was a child? Who knows? I had long conversations with two different old ladies with no idea who they were. They assumed I'd know, and I felt it was rude to ask. At least 'Evan' explained he was a family friend, and the father of a boy I went to primary school with (and a good friend of Tim's old boss, which is a crazy co-incidence as we were in another state at the time!)

I wasn't successful in finding a new winter dress before the event so I wore an old one that was too big on me but looked ok. Actually the shopping process was depressing, for some reason I looked fat and dumpy in everything I tried on, very unlike my other recent shopping experiences, even though I'm the same weight! I refuse to buy anything that makes me look like that.

Group photo of Poppa with all the sons, grandsons, great grandsons and in-laws.

 And with the granddaughters, great granddaughters and in-laws (I have my arm linked with Poppa, the only one wearing glasses).

It was also Tim and my 16th wedding anniversary, so in the evening we went out to dinner. It was a restaurant we hadn't tried before. The food was nice but we were right at the front where it was very noisy and also cold from people going in and out or the door being propped open. They couldn't move us to another table because they were full. I kept my coat on most of the time. We liked the food, but I think we'll save that restaurant for better weather or check when we book that we can be seated at the back.

Today is Mother's Day, I received some lovely presents - like slippers with inserts that you heat in the microwave! - and breakfast and lunch made for me. It was cold and rainy outside so it was a quiet day at home doing some study, watching Librarians Season 4 and trying to avoid the news (Eurovision was 5am our time and there are always spoilers about who won before we get to watch it in the evening) then in the evening - Eurovision Party! Every year we get family and friends to come over and watch with us. None of our favourite groups even made it to the top 10, I think. Oh well, it was fun.

Halfway!

Monday:

This morning I weighed 71.4 kg, a massive loss of 1.6 kg but actually part of that belongs to the week before where I had a blip on Monday and didn’t show a loss. And my MyFitnessPal notified me that I’m halfway to my goal weight! OMG halfway! I don’t know if I ever believed I could get this far. Ive been on and off diets for years but I’m counting this attempt from 14 August 2017; so it’s taken 32 weeks, seven and a half months. Although I wasn’t “on a diet” all that time I was seriously trying for most of it. And taking Duromine most of that time. Yay Duromine!

Aiden and I continued to be unwell for the rest of last week. He still has a bit of a cough and I’m still a bit weak but we’re back to our normal routine. I haven’t exercised in so long, but I’m not about to get back into it yet. I still feel a bit fragile.

My sister-in-law Ping had her birthday party on Saturday, lunch at Yum Cha. If you haven’t tried Yum Cha, it’s where an endless stream of waitresses come past with trolleys of different Chinese food and you pick what you want and share with the table. Mainly things like spring rolls and dumplings. Pork belly. Sesame prawn toast. Lots of meat/seafood, lots of carbs, often deep fried, very little vegetable. I love it! Little portions of lots of different yummy things. But definitely special occasion only, not healthy. It’s usually pretty cheap too, but we were at a fancy expensive place. The only thing I didn’t like was that for some reason they chose a restaurant a long way away, so it was an hour each way sitting in traffic.

This morning I did my volunteer library work, which went smoothly. I wore my navy sailor dress.

I had an exciting phone call at the end of last week, the details of my work placement for next term. Three days a week for eight weeks at a local TAFE - not the one I go to which is in the city, the local one doesn’t teach library studies - so the main users of this library will be adult students like myself. I assume I’ll get experience in all different aspects of library work. I’m really looking forward to it. I’ve been told my main assessable task will be developing a children’s story time session (so obviously little kids use the library too). Dealing with children isn’t my dream job but I’m fine with it and I’ve taken my own children to a million library storytime sessions so I know how they work.

Tim's birthday

Thursday:

It was my lovely husband's birthday yesterday. He arranged for the day off work, it ended up being a quiet day at home as Aiden and I were still sick. I send Aiden to school on Tuesday but it turned out he was coughing all day, so he was home yesterday and today. He's not seriously sick, but coughing and sore throat and no energy. He isn't eating much, and as he has no body fat to spare he is looking rather thin in the face now. I've been headachy and fatigued with jelly legs, so there has been a lot of sitting around reading and watching TV! I missed TAFE this week.

We did go out to a fancy restaurant for dinner for Tim's birthday, Aiden and I had entrees (starters) instead of mains and then I had half a dessert and that was plenty. Aiden barely touched his but at least he ate some garlic bread. My poor baby, drooping at the table.

My weight gain on Monday was only temporary, the next day it had dropped back to Sunday's weight and has continued to go down. I'm making inroads into virgin fat again! I'm really glad I changed those black pants for the smaller size, my new khaki pants are already feeling a bit loose.

Birthday

Sunday:

I'm waiting for Tim and Jasmine to finish icing my birthday cake for afternoon tea...

Last night we went out to dinner at my favourite local tapas restaurant. I love being able to have little bits of lots of different things rather than a plate of all the same thing. It also allows you to try something new without being afraid you will hate it and waste a whole meal.

Then this morning I was given some exciting presents. The two most memorable are probably the purple contact lenses with a weird design on them (I will try them tonight when people come over) that they got at Comicon, and the warm rug shaped like a mermaid's tail to snuggle under when watching TV. Oh, and a DVD series about secret superhero librarians!

Most of the day has been relaxing and playing computer games, but tonight we have family over for birthday dinner. Lovely day so far. And cake soon!


.... ok here is my lovely cake.

I did NOT eat this huge slab! I only had a few bites. Very rich and sweet.

We shared most of it with the family later, and I gave Tim candles to put on it. So he came out with the cake saying "Natalie wants candles and a happy birthday song." !! How embarrassing. Adults are supposed to cringe with awkwardness while people are singing Happy Birthday, not ASK for the experience.

Here is me preparing dinner. I've started wearing an apron when cooking, to protect my clothes. Handy devices. Doesn't the food look healthy! Luckily you can't see the chicken in cream sauce or the potatoes with crispy bacon.

And here is me with my mermaid tail rug. I love it! The 'necklace' is supposed to be a tiara but didn't really fit on my head. It's glow-in-the-dark. And goes well with the tail.

I tried to put in the weird contact lenses but they were too uncomfortable. I'll try again another time after I've washed them, but I don't know if they fitted me properly. I used to wear real prescription contacts and I had no trouble with those.

We played choose-your-own Trivial Pursuit after dinner. We have several different sets and for each question people got to choose normal questions, children's (only if you were a child), Harry Potter theme or World of Warcraft theme. I had a very nice birthday.

Sand

Thursday:

Yesterday we took advantage of the fact we had no visitors, and relaxed most of the day. Then in the late afternoon, after the worst heat of the day was over, we went to the beach. The kids were very keen to try out their Christmas boogie boards (is that what they are called in other countries? like a cut-off surf board). They had fun, but it wasn't really a good day for it. There was a very strong wind, so every time they cruised in on their boards on the little waves they were pushed a long way down the beach and had to trudge back to where the safe area was marked by the flags (patrolled by life guards). And being on the beach itself was quite unpleasant, with the sand flaying skin off your bones. I still have sand in my ears despite soaking my head in the bath last night. But at least no-one got sunburned!

My husband is slightly right of middle in the blue Tshirt, with Jasmine in black behind him and Aiden over to the right with the orange/red board. It's the only photo I took between gusts of sand. I didn't deliberately put them in the side of the photo, but I could barely see what was in the frame and had to point and guess.

I did go in the water up to my waist for a little while but found it a bit cold and also full of displaced sand. I am really looking forward to our pool!

After rinsing off some of the sand in the public showers, we went out to dinner at a steak restaurant. Steak and salad was a pretty good choice for my diet but I also ate the curly fries.... and then we ordered dessert. Whoops. I had a deep-fried mars bar. Urg. I felt sick half way through but ate it anyway. My stomach looked like I had a balloon shoved up my shirt and I could barely stay awake the rest of the evening, but worse was my blood glucose level which was 12.2 mmol/L when I tested. That is into diabetic levels and possibly the highest I have ever tested. Really bad choice.

After nodding and dozing in front of the TV for a while, I went to bed and slept for nine and a half hours! For the last month or so I've usually only got around six. That was a good sleep, I guess, although I remember dreaming about being in hospital dizzy and with a fever. I was worried about my weigh-in this morning but I have already dropped back down to my lowest recent weight so that was good. I should end 2016 on a low for the year which is awesome.

 Today will be the hottest of the summer so far and I have no plans to leave the air conditioned house.

[edit: my brother-in-law Nick came over this afternoon and mentioned that he and my little niece Emma were at the same beach at the same time as us yesterday! They only dipped their toes in and played in the sand so they didn't need to be between the safety flags and were a bit further along.]

Next

Thursday:

This morning I sent my synopsis and the first three chapters of my book to another literary agent. I only really have a choice of four Australian agents that I like the look of and that take my kind of book, and two aren't accepting submissions at the moment. I'll check those two early next year, but otherwise if this one doesn't take me I'll be querying publishers directly which is also fine, I just wanted to try the agents first.

It took me a few days to get this one organised because they wanted a hardcopy mailed to them instead of an email (I am actually a tiny bit concerned about how old-fashioned this is, what does it say about the company?), and my printer ran out of ink and then once I bought more and refilled that the printer decided it was hungry and spent an afternoon chewing up paper. But that is done now.

Jasmine's teachers were at a union meeting this morning so I drove her to school rather late, and somehow I'd forgotten to have breakfast and I had to stop at the post office anyway so I went to a café. French toast with bacon sounded nice (definitely not diet friendly) but it was horrible. The syrup was spiced with something I didn't like at all. I ate most of the bacon and about two bites of French toast. Such a shame. Probably a good thing for my waistline and my blood sugar levels that I didn't eat all that sugary sweetness.

Really stinking hot day. I didn't notice it much, at home in the air con, until taking the kids to their gymnastics class in the late afternoon. That building is so hot in summer and freezing in winter and always smells of kid sweat and feet! But I pretended I was in a sauna and tried to enjoy it.

It begins

Monday:

Not a great weigh in this morning; 80.3 kg is 0.1 kg UP from last Monday after lots of fluctuations all week. But there are reasons for it, one that was in my control and one that wasn't.

The "out of my control" is that it's a time of the month when I retain water. It happens, it will go again in a few days, I'm not worried. The "in my control" was yesterday's eating! We had a very busy day and breakfast was the only meal at home. In the morning we went to see baby Lucy - so cute! She was very small when born (no one seems to know why, she was full term) but is growing rapidly and at three weeks old looks like a perfect porcelain doll.

Then we dropped Jasmine at a birthday party and went to lunch at a nearby Thai restaurant. I did make careful choices, I thought, but the entrée (starter) chicken wings turned out to be crumbed and deep fried (I should have asked questions!) and my Thai beef salad was delicious but I'm sure had a lot of sugar in the dressing. I don't think I overate, and my estimation of calories was around 500 which is high for one meal on my current WOE but not terrible, but nevertheless afterward I felt tired, bloated and headachy. I wanted a nap. And then I wanted to EAT. MORE FOOD NOW.

We spent the afternoon finishing the gardening work, I am now covered in scratches and mosquito bites and have sore arm and pec muscles, and I snacked on some cheese and an apple. Hungry but trying hard. Then we went to my sister-in-law's for dinner, they did a BBQ and I was completely in control of what I put on my plate, I had a little more meat than I probably should have but also plenty of salad and no dessert so I think I did ok. But when I got home I shovelled in a big serve of mixed nuts. It was way more food than I have been eating and I kept wanting more. Might be a bit of PMS but I'm mainly blaming the sugar.

Today Tim and I sprang out of bed early because the guy with the excavator said he would be here at 7:00. At around 9:30 I called and was told Phil was just finishing up another job first and yes I had time to go out for an hour before he got here. So I went and did the grocery shopping. Phil came with the excavator at noon. That thing is huge, no wonder we had to do so much work to clear a way through to the backyard!

My favourite bit was when Phil used the excavator to build a ramp for itself, pulling rocks and soil down from the backyard wasteland. I wish Aiden could have been home to watch.

Then he set to work levelling out the backyard. Compared to the tree removal, the excavator isn't that noisy which is great, I was expecting more headaches. The site manager Angelo came and marked out where the pool goes, then Phil spent the rest of the afternoon digging. He is down to solid rock, so it's going to be harder from now on.

Baby Shower and Birthday Party

Saturday:

It was a busy day with a baby shower then a birthday party at a restaurant.

The baby shower was lovely, a group of about 20 women, some of whom I knew well, some I had met a few times before and some I'd never met. I didn't really get around to chatting to new people but I was particularly happy that I was able to have a good talk to a woman I'd met a few times and liked but hadn't had time to get to know before.

There was plenty of food, mountains of food. Cupcakes and little tarts and mini quiches and all sorts of things. I ended up trying at least five different things but most of them only ate a little bite or two then left on my plate. My favourite was a pikelet (little fluffy pancake) cooked with raspberries all through. Not sweet, but delicious. Jasmine was invited too, she ate so much! I don't mind as long as it's not too often.

Veronica cried when she opened her gifts and we all laughed at her when she blubbered out "it's the hormones!"

Tim's brother Nick chose to have his birthday party at a German restaurant. I didn't even know German restaurants were a thing. Don't they just eat sausage and cabbage? It reminds me of that joke:

Heaven is where the police are British, the lovers French, the mechanics German, the chefs Italian, and it is all organized by the Swiss.

Hell is where the police are German, the lovers Swiss, the mechanics French, the chefs British, and it is all organized by the Italians.

Except I thought it was German cooking in hell. Because we were in a big group, of course we had to have a set menu instead of choosing. There was quite a lot of concern amongst those who don't like pork! But German is apparently Nick's favourite and it was his birthday so he got to choose! There were certainly lots of sausages, about six different types, and several kinds of pickled cabbage! Pork knuckle and ham and prosciutto, mainly pig products. But there was also schnitzel and pork belly with crispy crackling so that was yummy. And very fatty, I felt a bit ill. And tired, we got dessert (which I didn't eat) at 10pm.

Usually I would say the company made up for the food, but unfortunately it was one of those places where the background noise of music and crowds of people is so loud you can only talk to the person right next to you by shouting and repeating yourself. Aiden was very bored, he played on my phone until the battery ran out then moved on to daddy's. I didn't really get to talk to anyone, so it wasn't a great night for me. Came home and went straight to bed, was probably asleep before the kids. Best part of the evening!

Mirage

Sunday:

My uncle (dad's brother) and aunt are up from the country, staying with their son who lives about an hour away from here. Last night we went over to have dinner with them at a restaurant. It's the middle of winter here but I thought I'd be fine in warm indoor clothing - I'd just be in the car or in a restaurant right? It turned out we were seated out in the courtyard! I suppose with 14 of us they couldn't fit us anywhere else. It was a very nice courtyard, with live music and a kid's play area and outdoor heaters, but it was still night time in winter and everyone was cold, even those who had wisely worn jackets and beanies. When I got home I soaked in a hot bath to recover.

The food was good, the company was good, the music was nice. It was great to have a chat with family I don't see often. I didn't get to talk to my cousin much, he has triplets who are nearly three years old and very active! He and his wife and the older child (I think she is 13) were running after them all night. At least they had the playground. But I got to talk to my uncle and aunt who I used to stay with on the farm (or at nanna's next door) every summer until I was about 21.

There was talk of them coming over here for lunch today but they said they would call to confirm. They didn't call until 1:15! I had long since given up on them. They'd decided not to come. A bit rude not to give me notice, I think. Actually it turned out for the best because the pool guy was still here.

We'd chosen a contractor for the pool build (Mirage) and the project manager came back today to do some more detailed measuring and planning, and for us to sign the contract. He was here so much longer than I expected. He came at 10:00, was outside for over an hour then came in to do paperwork. At 1:00 I cooked some pasta and fed the kids, and after a while longer ate a little bit myself standing at the counter while he was going through the paperwork with Tim. If I'd known how long he was going to be here I would have offered him lunch, or just eaten in front of him, but I kept thinking he was nearly finished and about to leave. I did give him tea and biscuits earlier but I didn't eat then. I was so hungry I was feeling quite nauseated. My blood sugar goes all wonky if I don't eat regularly. I was no longer paying any attention to what he was saying, my head was fuzzy and I just wanted him to leave. I left it to Tim to check the contract. Finally he went at 2:30 and Tim and I got to eat some congealed pasta. Four and a half hours the guy was here!

Should have a pool by Christmas though.

Risque review

Friday:

For Christmas Tim was given a voucher for theatre tickets and last night he finally used them and we went to see "Risqué Review" which was dinner and burlesque cabaret. A cousin came over to babysit the kids, and I met Tim in the city after work. I was a bit dubious but it turned out to be really good. There was a singer with a very nice voice, three dancing girls in a variety of skimpy costumes (but no more revealing than you'd see on a beach and probably more modest than many music videos these days!) and one man who was mainly a prop for the ladies but then he took his shirt off and did a very impressive pole dance! Very strong. But he was kind of brooding and intense (which may have just been his stage persona), for attractiveness I preferred our waiter who was cute and always smiling.

The most memorable performance was one lady in a bath. They wheeled out a claw-foot bath on a pedestal, with a girl in a bikini (in real water). There was a trapeze hoop suspended above and she swung and flipped herself around very acrobatically. They handed out umbrellas to the patrons! I only saw one lady use hers though, most people didn't mind getting splashed a little when the performer flipped her hair or spun in circles with water drops flying off her legs.

The food was also excellent which I didn't expect at all. It was a great night. We got home 11:30 or so, way past my bed time!

Today I did the grocery shopping and some more book-thinking. Some ideas are coming together.

Movies

Sunday:

Yesterday we had lunch with family before going to see the movie "Warcraft". We took the kids even though it was rated M, even Harry Potter movies are rated M. We all play the computer game that it was based on, World of Warcraft. It was quite a good movie, not stellar. Everyone seems to agree that it would be a bit confusing if you don't play the game. I ate m&ms in the movies but did not partake of the ice cream everyone else had afterwards. Ice cream is ok, not my passion, not something I want to spend calories on in winter.

I went to bed really early, exhausted. Had two sessions of night sweats paired with bad dreams. Got up exhausted this morning. Pelvic pain, sore foot, no sleep, headache, feeling sorry for myself today. Cranky with my fitbit that tells me yay you got 10 hours 20 mins sleep! Really, fitbit? I may have been lying quietly in bed that long, doesn't mean I got a restful night!

On to nicer topics, today was a birthday lunch at a café, the booking was for 1:30pm so by the time everyone gets there (through pouring rain), reconnects with other guests, orders, it was 2:30 by the time we got any food. Very late lunch for me! But it was nice food, and good company. We stood around chatting for a while afterwards.

When we got home we finished off watching the last Hobbit movie. Next weekend we'll start the Lord of the Rings saga.

Niece

Saturday:

We babysat our three-year-old niece for a few hours today so Nick and Ping could enjoy their anniversary with lunch and a movie. We walked up to the park, quite a distance for little legs, and had lunch at McDonald's before walking home again. That took up a lot of the time, and Jasmine entertained her the rest. Emma is a little inclined to wilfulness but it all went smoothly and was fun.

My plantar wart is back. 48 hours back to full size and sore to walk on. Sigh.

In the evening we went out to a surprise birthday dinner for Tim's Aunt Vanessa's 60th. She thought she was just going out to dinner with her husband, walked into the restaurant to find 60 of us waiting! Far too much food, I feel quite bloated. Her son, Tim's cousin Matthew, is a musician and he played guitar and sang throughout the evening which was lovely. I'll have to find you a link to his YouTube channel.

My Christmas present last year from Tim was a big TV. As well as wanting a bigger screen, I particularly wanted one so we could put the old one (only ever had one TV before this) in the kitchen. In our old house I could see the TV from the kitchen while I was cooking, as well as the lounge and eating area. But in this house I can't, the lounge is separate from the kitchen. I like to watch while cooking and washing up etc. Anyway, tonight the new one suddenly died! It's only six months old! At least it's definitely still under warranty.

Thirty three and thirty four: The Entrance

Saturday:

We spent the weekend at The Entrance with Nick, Ping and little Emma. It's a town on the beach a couple of hours North of home. It didn't start auspiciously at all. We booked our accomodation more than a week ago, and as we got closer to the time we found that the forcast was for rain all weekend! Nick and Ping were staying in a cabin at a campground, we had a serviced apartment. We didn't want to be confined inside the whole time.

There was a lot of traffic getting out of the city and we didn't get here until 1pm - Nick and Ping came earlier and already had lunch before we got here so we didn't meet up yet. We didn't know where to go to eat. We were on what we thought was the shopping strip on the Main Street, but there wasn't much open. Seemed odd for a Saturday. We eventually went to a crowded cafe, it turned out to serve what I would call hippy food. All organic bean sprouts and macrobiotic chicken. Tim and Aiden both loved their lunch, mine was partly to my taste and partly not (and I gave a lot of the nice bit to the kids so I ended up a bit hungry), Jasmine couldn't find anything she was willing to eat. So after a while I walked with her up to the local pie shop. It had literally four pies left sitting in the warmer, and all stuff Jasmine didn't like, like curry beef. We walked a bit more and I bought her an American muffin. It was raining and a rather gloomy.

Time to check into our accomodation. But there is no reception desk!?? We reread the confirmation email and it turns out we have to pick up the key elsewhere, from a locked box in town, for which they had sent us the passcode. Bugger. But the benefit was that at least we then found the true heart of town, down by the beach of course! We got our key and came back to find it didn't work. Couldn't get it to turn. So there followed an hour and a half of trying to call people, leaving messages, waiting for someone to call back, waiting for the guy to get here, and of course messages back and forth with Nick and Ping as to why we still couldn't meet them yet. The guy's master key wouldn't work either! But luckily he was able to give us another room and finally we got to go down to the shore. I was a bit annoyed that it was 4pm already! But at least it wasn't raining any more.

The Entrance is where the sea meets Tuggerah Lake over big sand flats that you can walk on at low tide. Lots of pelicans! We just missed the pelican feeding time.

The shore front is pretty, with playgrounds for children, grass, palm trees, benches, and lots of restaurants. Ping and I sat and had a snack and a chat while the menfolk looked after the kids, then walked a little before going to an Italian restaurant for dinner. The food was very nice (I had pasta with a spicy tomato, olive and bacon sauce). We came back to our room and the kids ignored the cold to have a quick swim in the pool before bed. So the last few hours of the day were pretty good.

Until Tim's allergies attacked, obviously something in the room, maybe the ancient sofa. He spent the rest of the night sneezing and blowing his nose.

Sunday:

We woke to the sound of heavy rain and thunder. But by the time we'd packed up and gone back to the seafront to find breakfast, it was merely drizzling. I had a lovely brunch of bacon and eggs. Then Nick and Ping wanted to go fishing, they had brought their rods with them. I found the rest of the morning boring and cold (I gave Aiden my jumper to wear over the top of his own so he wouldn't freeze, he has no body fat for insulation) but on the up side the kids got to try fishing with little hassle or expense. And Aiden caught a tiny fish.

At noon we decided we'd had enough fishing and left them to it. The drive home was a bit nasty, I was driving and missed a turnoff when we got to Sydney and was forced into the complicated city streets. Tim took over and we managed to navigate back home, the trip taking about half an hour longer than it should have.

The weather and the hotel debacle made it not an ideal weekend, but still better than camping! And I think it was a nice area.

I didn't focus on my diet over the weekend, but neither did I binge like Friday. I just ate normally. My tongue is a bit sore though, too much sugar (three cups of tea with brunch!). We have family coming over for dinner tonight. I'm making roast lemon chicken, yummy, dessert doesn't really appeal to me right now.

Twelve: debate

Saturday:

Despite what I wrote only a couple of days ago, this morning I decided that this was a stupid time try to stick to a strict diet. I've been sick for weeks, my hormones are all messed up (into week three of "that time of the month") and now the school holidays have started. Who am I kidding? I can't even stick to a diet when the conditions are perfect! I'm insane to keep trying now - trying and failing.

So I gave it up. Not to mindlessly binge, but so I didn't have to spend every moment of the day focussed on food; what and how much. So I ate a delicious healthy quinoa dish for lunch - but I didn't weigh it. I had an orange without worrying how many carbs it had. We went out for a walk and I had ice cream without stressing or feeling like a failure. It seemed pretty good.

But now I'm about to go out to dinner and the movies with the girls (women of Tim's family) and I am worried again. I have health issues (and body image issues) because of my weight and I need to do something about it. Will there ever be a perfect time to diet? Do I have rice/noodles/potato/bread with dinner tonight, or are starches banned? Can I take a snack into the movie? What do "eating healthy" and "lifestyle change" mean for me? Do I start low carb/calorie again right now? Tomorrow? Monday? When I'm no longer sick? In two weeks when the kids go back to school? I still like the BSD diet but I feel like I need a couple of weeks without hurdles to get going with it.

I'm not sure where I am going to go from here.

[edit: this was just a bad day talking - see tomorrow!]

Happy Easter

Sunday:

We started the day with an Easter Egg hunt, inside because the Easter Bunny knows there are too many creatures outside that would be very attracted to shiny foil and the smell of chocolate. This is my personal haul - big egg and bunny from Tim, little eggs from the hunt:

My plan is to eat some today and tomorrow, then put the rest away for occasional treats. I'm starting my healthy lifestyle change on Tuesday. How odd not starting on a Monday!

Actually I didn't feel much like eating chocolate today, and hardly had any. Aiden has had a cold for a couple of days and now Tim and I have it. At least Aiden was better today! Tim took the kids to see Kung Fu Panda 3 while I had a nap in the afternoon and then I felt a lot better, and Tim seemed ok in the early evening.

Ping was celebrating her birthday with dinner in a Japanese restaurant tonight. The company was good and we had a nice chat, but I was grumpy about the food. First they brought a little complimentary miso soup for everyone - except me. I was invisible. Then my main didn't quite look like what I thought I ordered. I queried it but was told it was right. I didn't like it at all and only picked at it. Then we worked out at the end that my main had got switched with someone else and they had eaten it all. I survived by stealing food off Aiden's plate.

Worse, though, was that Tim was rapidly going downhill throughout the evening. He was starting to look really sick. He realised eventually that as well as the cold, he was reacting to someone's perfume. We left as soon as we'd finished eating. Or in my case, not eating!

All those little temporary problems, however, are so fleeting. One family member didn't come to dinner because her father died today. Getting the wrong food, or having a cold, are nothing compared to something like that.

Outside

Thursday:

Another day spent mostly outside. Quite unusual for me! We did some errands in the city, which involved at least 45 minutes brisk walking back and forth, then met Tim for a nice lunch where we sat in the outdoor section of the restaurant. Then I took the kids to a nearby playground where they swang and slid and dug sand and got rather wet spraying each other with water canon things. I mostly sat and read. One great thing about older kids is you don't have to watch them every second! Although I rather regretted telling them they could get as wet as they wanted once it came time to get back in the car.

It was really nice Spring weather today, perfect to be outside. But it is going to be 10 degrees hotter by next Tuesday, like mid-summer. I've told the kids we'll have to have a couple of movie days, inside in air conditioning. I'm glad we've been outside while the temperature was milder.

I was going to leave rescheduling my doctor appointment until the kids were back at school in a bit over a week, to get test results, but my throat is still swollen and sore even though my flu is mostly over. I'm worried I need antibiotics. I have a tendency to throat infections whenever I get sick. I'll give it a few more days.

These school holidays have been pretty nice so far, but I need to think of some more things to do! Tim was going to take some time off but we decided we needed to save his days off for the big move in a few weeks, so I have to entertain the kids by myself. Not that they are difficult to entertain, but home is a bit boring at the moment with half their toys packed away. They enjoy being out and about anyway.