Saturday:
So I turned 49 the other day, one year until 50. This year I am determined to focus on my health. Sleep. Exercise. More fruit and vegetables. Water. I have made a start on some of these things.
I had my last day at my old workplace yesterday. We shared a lunch and everyone seemed sad to see me go. It wasn't a bad job, and I liked the other staff. I have a week off now (it's school holidays, Tim stayed home with the kids the first week) then I start at my new workplace. Same job, different location. It's an improvement in every way - closer, higher pay, less busy etc - except that it has less job security.
I've been having a hard time the last few weeks. I've been in peri-menopause for years (it seems like I've been saying "at least five years" for a long time) and my main symptom is night sweats. At the moment it's nearly every night. I wake up all sweaty - and then get very cold because it's the middle of winter and being in damp pyjamas is no joke - and then I rarely get back to sleep. So I am utterly exhausted. Dragging myself through the days, going to bed before the kids at night. I'll be seeing my gyno but I couldn't get an appointment for another six weeks. I plan to take a lot of naps while I've got this time off, and also try some vitamin/herbal medicine.
Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts
Friday, July 12, 2019
Monday, August 20, 2018
Hayfever
Monday:
My food choices have been terrible this week. Not only too much junk, but also hardly fruit or vegetables. I’ve been affected badly by hay fever for a few weeks, I hardly ever get serious symptoms but this year the entire state is in drought plus it is very windy so pollens and allergens are everywhere even though it is still winter. When I was buying some medication the pharmacist told me everyone is bad this year. When I feel unwell I generally turn to ‘comfort’ food which does not help my body heal! I need nutrients, not over-processed frankenfood! Determined to do better this week.
My weight is up more than a kilogram to 72.9 kg.
Tim has asthma, luckily he doesn't seem too badly impacted by the conditions although other asthmatics I know are. But he is a heavy breather while asleep (not only now, always) which I find very frustrating. We don't have a spare room here for me to retreat to. My current solution is to have a 'daybed', Aiden's old bed tucked behind the three-seater in the lounge room. The kids (and visiting children) love lying on it during the day, and I can stumble out there when the loud breathing gets too annoying. I mainly use it on weekends when I would love to have a sleep-in but never can with Tim beside me - and he always sleeps in on the weekend, he needs it after a tiring week. It means I don't start the day full of resentment that he gets to sleep in and I don't.
The past two weeks there has been a substitute instead of the usual teacher-librarian at my son’s school. This morning there was no-one, and it was still dark and quiet. I went in and turned on some lights and the computer and sat there for half an hour just in case. Generally class 4G are being taught research skills and borrowing books on Monday mornings, and pairs of children return books for their classes, which I scan in and return to the shelves. Today only one class apparently didn’t get the memo and returned a few books for me to process. It was kind of weird sitting there in the gloom (I didn’t bother finding light switches for the whole library). But it got me out of the house for a nice walk there and back. I hope the teacher-librarian is ok.
My food choices have been terrible this week. Not only too much junk, but also hardly fruit or vegetables. I’ve been affected badly by hay fever for a few weeks, I hardly ever get serious symptoms but this year the entire state is in drought plus it is very windy so pollens and allergens are everywhere even though it is still winter. When I was buying some medication the pharmacist told me everyone is bad this year. When I feel unwell I generally turn to ‘comfort’ food which does not help my body heal! I need nutrients, not over-processed frankenfood! Determined to do better this week.
My weight is up more than a kilogram to 72.9 kg.
Tim has asthma, luckily he doesn't seem too badly impacted by the conditions although other asthmatics I know are. But he is a heavy breather while asleep (not only now, always) which I find very frustrating. We don't have a spare room here for me to retreat to. My current solution is to have a 'daybed', Aiden's old bed tucked behind the three-seater in the lounge room. The kids (and visiting children) love lying on it during the day, and I can stumble out there when the loud breathing gets too annoying. I mainly use it on weekends when I would love to have a sleep-in but never can with Tim beside me - and he always sleeps in on the weekend, he needs it after a tiring week. It means I don't start the day full of resentment that he gets to sleep in and I don't.
The past two weeks there has been a substitute instead of the usual teacher-librarian at my son’s school. This morning there was no-one, and it was still dark and quiet. I went in and turned on some lights and the computer and sat there for half an hour just in case. Generally class 4G are being taught research skills and borrowing books on Monday mornings, and pairs of children return books for their classes, which I scan in and return to the shelves. Today only one class apparently didn’t get the memo and returned a few books for me to process. It was kind of weird sitting there in the gloom (I didn’t bother finding light switches for the whole library). But it got me out of the house for a nice walk there and back. I hope the teacher-librarian is ok.
Wednesday, March 7, 2018
Back on
Thursday:
I went to my doctor on Tuesday after my haircut and got another script for Duromine, so you'll have to ignore what I said before about waiting a much longer time before trying it again! I was getting frustrated with my inability to lose weight without it.
Brief summary of Duromine history (all dates are Mondays which don't 100% match with actual start and end dates but Monday is my weigh day:
Start 16/08/17: 84.7 kg, waist 102 cm (waist not measured until a week later so might have been more)
After 3 months 13/11/17: 75.1 kg, waist 97 cm.
Loss of 9.6 kg and 5 cm off waist. Minimal side effects but didn't seem to be working much by the end of the three months. Delighted with result. Felt so much happier in my body.
More or less maintained over 2 month break including Christmas period.
Restart 01/01/18: 75.4 kg, waist 97 cm
After 1 month 05/02/18: 72.6 kg, waist 96 cm
Loss of 1.8 kg, 1 cm from waist. Much stronger side effects including nausea and extremely dry mouth. Also dizziness but my doctor thinks that is my low blood pressure and the flu not the Duromine, and it continued after I stopped the medication while I had the flu. The side effects didn't seem worth the relatively small weight loss so I didn't ask for a repeat prescription.
This Monday, 05/03/18: 74.9 kg, waist 97 cm, hips 107 cm, bust 101 cm.
Regain of 1.3 kg and 1 cm on waist, most of what I'd lost in January.
The doctors at my clinic rotate every six months or so, I once tried going elsewhere to get continuity of care but didn't like the doctor who looked at my high blood sugar and obesity and basically said 'you're fine'. So I went back to this place. I have liked every single one of the doctors I've seen here over the past two and a half years (five of them I guess!) and this new one is the nicest yet! There had been a change since I last went. They are all young, female, straight from medical school I think and this is part of their work experience, up to date with new information and keen as mustard. Not much experience though. (There is also a experienced male doctor continuously there but I like to see a female.) Anyway, she gave me a month of Duromine (have to see her again before I get repeats) and wants me to get down to 65 kg which means losing another 10 kg, but she didn't just hand me the script. We talked about weight loss strategies for now and in the future when I'm no longer on Duromine, and somehow I found her more motivating that other people who have probably said the exact same thing. Probably a combination of her charisma and attitude and my own mental state. Things like restricting treats to weekends, exercising more, reducing portions, drinking more water, all stuff I know but don't always do. She wants to see me again in a couple of weeks.
Yesterday I started taking it again (have to take it early in the morning) and felt energised and appetite-suppressed all day. I foolishly read a book on the train on my way home from the city, which can give me motion sickness at the best of times, and got a bit nauseated which took a couple of hours to subside even after I got home. I had 2 fruits and 5 vegetables and some lean protein, small amount of fat, ten glasses of water. Excellent day. Nearly an hour of brisk walking, made up the last four minutes jogging up and down stairs at home because I wanted to hit an hour of exercise.
I slept poorly last night, just lay there wide awake quite a bit. Also had to get up five times to pee! Probably got four good hours of sleep. That's fine, I know it will take only a couple of nights to resolve then hopefully I'll sleep really well like I have in the past.
A little bit nauseated all day, dry mouth but not unbearably so like last time. I really hope the nausea passes soon. I keep burping (and feel better) so I seem to be creating gas in my stomach? I did 60 mins dance this morning and went for a 30 min walk in the afternoon. Tired now - that is a lot for me! Eating was good.
I went to my doctor on Tuesday after my haircut and got another script for Duromine, so you'll have to ignore what I said before about waiting a much longer time before trying it again! I was getting frustrated with my inability to lose weight without it.
Brief summary of Duromine history (all dates are Mondays which don't 100% match with actual start and end dates but Monday is my weigh day:
Start 16/08/17: 84.7 kg, waist 102 cm (waist not measured until a week later so might have been more)
After 3 months 13/11/17: 75.1 kg, waist 97 cm.
Loss of 9.6 kg and 5 cm off waist. Minimal side effects but didn't seem to be working much by the end of the three months. Delighted with result. Felt so much happier in my body.
More or less maintained over 2 month break including Christmas period.
Restart 01/01/18: 75.4 kg, waist 97 cm
After 1 month 05/02/18: 72.6 kg, waist 96 cm
Loss of 1.8 kg, 1 cm from waist. Much stronger side effects including nausea and extremely dry mouth. Also dizziness but my doctor thinks that is my low blood pressure and the flu not the Duromine, and it continued after I stopped the medication while I had the flu. The side effects didn't seem worth the relatively small weight loss so I didn't ask for a repeat prescription.
This Monday, 05/03/18: 74.9 kg, waist 97 cm, hips 107 cm, bust 101 cm.
Regain of 1.3 kg and 1 cm on waist, most of what I'd lost in January.
The doctors at my clinic rotate every six months or so, I once tried going elsewhere to get continuity of care but didn't like the doctor who looked at my high blood sugar and obesity and basically said 'you're fine'. So I went back to this place. I have liked every single one of the doctors I've seen here over the past two and a half years (five of them I guess!) and this new one is the nicest yet! There had been a change since I last went. They are all young, female, straight from medical school I think and this is part of their work experience, up to date with new information and keen as mustard. Not much experience though. (There is also a experienced male doctor continuously there but I like to see a female.) Anyway, she gave me a month of Duromine (have to see her again before I get repeats) and wants me to get down to 65 kg which means losing another 10 kg, but she didn't just hand me the script. We talked about weight loss strategies for now and in the future when I'm no longer on Duromine, and somehow I found her more motivating that other people who have probably said the exact same thing. Probably a combination of her charisma and attitude and my own mental state. Things like restricting treats to weekends, exercising more, reducing portions, drinking more water, all stuff I know but don't always do. She wants to see me again in a couple of weeks.
Yesterday I started taking it again (have to take it early in the morning) and felt energised and appetite-suppressed all day. I foolishly read a book on the train on my way home from the city, which can give me motion sickness at the best of times, and got a bit nauseated which took a couple of hours to subside even after I got home. I had 2 fruits and 5 vegetables and some lean protein, small amount of fat, ten glasses of water. Excellent day. Nearly an hour of brisk walking, made up the last four minutes jogging up and down stairs at home because I wanted to hit an hour of exercise.
I slept poorly last night, just lay there wide awake quite a bit. Also had to get up five times to pee! Probably got four good hours of sleep. That's fine, I know it will take only a couple of nights to resolve then hopefully I'll sleep really well like I have in the past.
A little bit nauseated all day, dry mouth but not unbearably so like last time. I really hope the nausea passes soon. I keep burping (and feel better) so I seem to be creating gas in my stomach? I did 60 mins dance this morning and went for a 30 min walk in the afternoon. Tired now - that is a lot for me! Eating was good.
Tuesday, February 13, 2018
Back to TAFE
Wednesday:
TAFE is back this week, which I am really glad about. I felt well enough yesterday to drag myself to my first class. I only have three units left plus work placement to finish my degree. TAFE classes are pretty small, there are only 16 computers in each classroom, but this unit had nearly double that! They've asked if half of us can move to another free timeslot and since it's the only class I'm doing face-to-face and I don't care which day as long as it fits around kids school times, I'll be one of them. It worked out well, I know all but one of the people in the moving half but almost no-one in the other half! It was nice to see people from last year and chat. I didn't get to talk to Lauren, the girl who got the internship I wanted, I'd love to hear how it's going. I think she feels a bit awkward that she got it instead of me but I don't blame her for that!
The class I'm doing face-to-face is a higher-level subject which only the Diploma students do (some other classes are shared with Cert 4) assessed on one big research paper, I've already got an idea of what I want to do mine on. The teacher said to pick something that interests you because you'll be living with it all semester! Library-related of course.
I've been eating terribly for the past couple of weeks, my weight on Monday was 73.4 kg which was an increase of 0.8 kg for the week! (The next day it was 73.1, so there is probably a lot of water fluctuation.) I definitely need to get a handle on the sick comfort eating.
I had a really bad night last night and feel awful this morning. On Monday night I had a great sleep, Tim was away on a work thing that he felt he had to go to even though he's not fully well yet either. I had a big quiet bed to myself! But he was back last night. Tim has asthma so he is a heavy breather at the best of times, but of course it is much worse when he is blocked up with flu. I just couldn't sleep with his wheezing beside me. Eventually I went out to the lounge and got a little sleep there but it's not the same as being in a bed and I didn't have sheets or anything so I was a little cool (I didn't want to turn lights on to find them), it's summer here and was a hot night so it wasn't cold but it's still nice to have a covering. When I staggered back into our room just before Tim had to get up he didn't even know I'd been gone!
I'm certainly not perfect in the quiet sleeping stakes, by the way, I have sleep apnoea and of course currently the remains of the flu so I'm sure I'm just as bad! I know my CPAP machine (which I haven't used for ages) really disturbs his sleep (mine too!). We don't have a spare room here but I've been thinking seriously that we need a daybed set up somewhere for when we need it. There have been many nights when I've felt like I just can't stand being kept awake. We still have Aiden's old bedframe (he got a loft bed when we moved here), I'd just need to get a mattress. Kind of weird having a bed set up in the lounge, but I think it can look ok, I've seen it done. If we can get rid of the huge old TV cabinet that we tried to give to the Salvos but they didn't want it, and use that corner. You can make a daybed look more like something to sit on. But ready to crawl into. Are mattresses supposed to be replaced every ten years? If so we all need new ones!
I think Facebook is going to far with its targeted advertising. I was thinking about the daybed thing yesterday after the good night's sleep alone, hadn't mentioned it to anyone or looked up anything online, logged onto Facebook in the afternoon and there it was - an ad for a daybed. Mindreading is a step too far. It was a bit scary, really. Had I seen the ad in previous days and that's what made me think about it?
I feel like 2018 hasn't been great so far. I've been sick a lot of the time, depressed a bit, the weight loss isn't going well. I hope things pick up. I'll enjoy getting back into study.
TAFE is back this week, which I am really glad about. I felt well enough yesterday to drag myself to my first class. I only have three units left plus work placement to finish my degree. TAFE classes are pretty small, there are only 16 computers in each classroom, but this unit had nearly double that! They've asked if half of us can move to another free timeslot and since it's the only class I'm doing face-to-face and I don't care which day as long as it fits around kids school times, I'll be one of them. It worked out well, I know all but one of the people in the moving half but almost no-one in the other half! It was nice to see people from last year and chat. I didn't get to talk to Lauren, the girl who got the internship I wanted, I'd love to hear how it's going. I think she feels a bit awkward that she got it instead of me but I don't blame her for that!
The class I'm doing face-to-face is a higher-level subject which only the Diploma students do (some other classes are shared with Cert 4) assessed on one big research paper, I've already got an idea of what I want to do mine on. The teacher said to pick something that interests you because you'll be living with it all semester! Library-related of course.
I've been eating terribly for the past couple of weeks, my weight on Monday was 73.4 kg which was an increase of 0.8 kg for the week! (The next day it was 73.1, so there is probably a lot of water fluctuation.) I definitely need to get a handle on the sick comfort eating.
I had a really bad night last night and feel awful this morning. On Monday night I had a great sleep, Tim was away on a work thing that he felt he had to go to even though he's not fully well yet either. I had a big quiet bed to myself! But he was back last night. Tim has asthma so he is a heavy breather at the best of times, but of course it is much worse when he is blocked up with flu. I just couldn't sleep with his wheezing beside me. Eventually I went out to the lounge and got a little sleep there but it's not the same as being in a bed and I didn't have sheets or anything so I was a little cool (I didn't want to turn lights on to find them), it's summer here and was a hot night so it wasn't cold but it's still nice to have a covering. When I staggered back into our room just before Tim had to get up he didn't even know I'd been gone!
I'm certainly not perfect in the quiet sleeping stakes, by the way, I have sleep apnoea and of course currently the remains of the flu so I'm sure I'm just as bad! I know my CPAP machine (which I haven't used for ages) really disturbs his sleep (mine too!). We don't have a spare room here but I've been thinking seriously that we need a daybed set up somewhere for when we need it. There have been many nights when I've felt like I just can't stand being kept awake. We still have Aiden's old bedframe (he got a loft bed when we moved here), I'd just need to get a mattress. Kind of weird having a bed set up in the lounge, but I think it can look ok, I've seen it done. If we can get rid of the huge old TV cabinet that we tried to give to the Salvos but they didn't want it, and use that corner. You can make a daybed look more like something to sit on. But ready to crawl into. Are mattresses supposed to be replaced every ten years? If so we all need new ones!
I think Facebook is going to far with its targeted advertising. I was thinking about the daybed thing yesterday after the good night's sleep alone, hadn't mentioned it to anyone or looked up anything online, logged onto Facebook in the afternoon and there it was - an ad for a daybed. Mindreading is a step too far. It was a bit scary, really. Had I seen the ad in previous days and that's what made me think about it?
I feel like 2018 hasn't been great so far. I've been sick a lot of the time, depressed a bit, the weight loss isn't going well. I hope things pick up. I'll enjoy getting back into study.
Thursday, December 28, 2017
Taming the grass
Friday:
I was planning to get serious about my food from 1st January, but then found two good reasons not to wait. On Wednesday night we were at Nick & Ping's and did a bit of a Just Dance game, and my niece Emma insisted on watching all the replay videos. Oh my goodness I'm still so fat. It always surprises me, especially since I've lost a bit of weight recently, that I am a lot fatter in reality than I am in my head. Mirrors, photos, and apparently videos all ambush me.
Then I weighed myself Thursday morning to find my weight, which had stayed pretty steady over the Christmas indulgences, had suddenly caught up with reality too and jumped up a fair bit. I was unhappy with the number. So I decided not to wait another four days to stop eating so much junk.
I spent an hour and a half at least in the garden, working on the garden beds that don't yet have an edging of rocks so the pampered lawn has really invaded. I turned bits like this:
Into this:
It was quite hard sweaty work, the grass had put down lots of roots along the runners and took a lot of effort to rip out. Next cooler day I'll work on getting the rock edging in.
We had people over in the afternoon for a swim and Tim's dad also dropped in with Jo, and Jo's daughter and granddaughter, on their way home from spending Christmas with Jo's family. I put out lots of leftover chips and chocolates but only ate a little bit of cheese, a few grapes, and one Lindor ball. I call that a win! Calories good for the day.
I had a really bad sleep last night. That operation I had a year ago to remove fibroids fixed the heavy periods but didn't take away all the pain. It gets bad each month the week before my period, and I was lying awake in a lot of discomfort for quite a bit of the night. Still aches today. It's 34 C here so I'm tired and sore and hot and not feeling very happy. Still staying away from the bad food though. We still have some in the house but it should be all finished off on Sunday night. Anything left after that will go in the bin.
I was planning to get serious about my food from 1st January, but then found two good reasons not to wait. On Wednesday night we were at Nick & Ping's and did a bit of a Just Dance game, and my niece Emma insisted on watching all the replay videos. Oh my goodness I'm still so fat. It always surprises me, especially since I've lost a bit of weight recently, that I am a lot fatter in reality than I am in my head. Mirrors, photos, and apparently videos all ambush me.
Then I weighed myself Thursday morning to find my weight, which had stayed pretty steady over the Christmas indulgences, had suddenly caught up with reality too and jumped up a fair bit. I was unhappy with the number. So I decided not to wait another four days to stop eating so much junk.
I spent an hour and a half at least in the garden, working on the garden beds that don't yet have an edging of rocks so the pampered lawn has really invaded. I turned bits like this:
We had people over in the afternoon for a swim and Tim's dad also dropped in with Jo, and Jo's daughter and granddaughter, on their way home from spending Christmas with Jo's family. I put out lots of leftover chips and chocolates but only ate a little bit of cheese, a few grapes, and one Lindor ball. I call that a win! Calories good for the day.
I had a really bad sleep last night. That operation I had a year ago to remove fibroids fixed the heavy periods but didn't take away all the pain. It gets bad each month the week before my period, and I was lying awake in a lot of discomfort for quite a bit of the night. Still aches today. It's 34 C here so I'm tired and sore and hot and not feeling very happy. Still staying away from the bad food though. We still have some in the house but it should be all finished off on Sunday night. Anything left after that will go in the bin.
Thursday, November 2, 2017
Tired
Thursday:
I had my second cataloguing exam this morning. I think it went ok. Afterwards, my teacher told me about another cataloguing job going (a paid job this time, not a short-term internship, which I haven’t heard about yet), but it’s way over the other side of the city and would be about two hours travel each way. No way I can manage that within the kids’ school hours! I might investigate whether there is any option for working from home, but that defeats part of the purpose of working, for me. I’ve been home by myself too long.
I was feeling crushingly tired last night and went to bed early. I wasn’t worried, I’m usually tired in the evening. But today I was exhausted all day. Walking up stairs was like climbing a mountain, I could hardly keep my eyes open in class (not great in an exam!), fell asleep on the train on they way home and then napped at home until it was time to take the kids to gymnastics. Takeaway for dinner. I assume I’m coming down with something, hope it’s not too bad.
Speaking of sleeping in class, that girl Jessica still spends most lessons face down on her desk. When she is awake, she can be quite argumentative, often about random things nothing to do with the work, like politics. But mostly she sleeps. This afternoon she snoozed through the teacher’s explanation and while we were working on an exercise. Then we went around the class giving the answers. She was prodded awake but obviously she had no answers to give! She hadn’t even turned on her computer. After a moment the teacher moved on. I still wonder why on earth she is there! Why does she come to class? And why do the teachers put up with it? I suppose they may know something I don’t, that excuses her behaviour.
Lauren was having a bad day. She’s the other girl up for the internship. In the morning exam, right near the end, she knocked over her water bottle. She and Jake next to her had to scramble to keep everything out of the puddle, and it took her three trips to the bathroom at the other end of the hall to get enough paper towel to clean it up. But at least it was only water. At lunch, I was sitting with her and a couple of other people when she spilled her salad (with dressing) onto herself. And in the afternoon class she suddenly said she was getting a really strong smell... she investigated her backpack and found that her bottle of hand sanitizer had ‘exploded’ in her words. She wearily dragged herself and her bag off to the bathroom. Some days maybe you just shouldn’t get out of bed.
Speaking of which, time for sleeping.
I had my second cataloguing exam this morning. I think it went ok. Afterwards, my teacher told me about another cataloguing job going (a paid job this time, not a short-term internship, which I haven’t heard about yet), but it’s way over the other side of the city and would be about two hours travel each way. No way I can manage that within the kids’ school hours! I might investigate whether there is any option for working from home, but that defeats part of the purpose of working, for me. I’ve been home by myself too long.
I was feeling crushingly tired last night and went to bed early. I wasn’t worried, I’m usually tired in the evening. But today I was exhausted all day. Walking up stairs was like climbing a mountain, I could hardly keep my eyes open in class (not great in an exam!), fell asleep on the train on they way home and then napped at home until it was time to take the kids to gymnastics. Takeaway for dinner. I assume I’m coming down with something, hope it’s not too bad.
Speaking of sleeping in class, that girl Jessica still spends most lessons face down on her desk. When she is awake, she can be quite argumentative, often about random things nothing to do with the work, like politics. But mostly she sleeps. This afternoon she snoozed through the teacher’s explanation and while we were working on an exercise. Then we went around the class giving the answers. She was prodded awake but obviously she had no answers to give! She hadn’t even turned on her computer. After a moment the teacher moved on. I still wonder why on earth she is there! Why does she come to class? And why do the teachers put up with it? I suppose they may know something I don’t, that excuses her behaviour.
Lauren was having a bad day. She’s the other girl up for the internship. In the morning exam, right near the end, she knocked over her water bottle. She and Jake next to her had to scramble to keep everything out of the puddle, and it took her three trips to the bathroom at the other end of the hall to get enough paper towel to clean it up. But at least it was only water. At lunch, I was sitting with her and a couple of other people when she spilled her salad (with dressing) onto herself. And in the afternoon class she suddenly said she was getting a really strong smell... she investigated her backpack and found that her bottle of hand sanitizer had ‘exploded’ in her words. She wearily dragged herself and her bag off to the bathroom. Some days maybe you just shouldn’t get out of bed.
Speaking of which, time for sleeping.
Sunday, August 20, 2017
Waterfall
Sunday:
This is our waterfall working! The water looks clearer now too. Sparkling green.
I had an awesome night's sleep last night! At least eight hours of solid sleep, no restlessness or early waking, woke just before seven. Amazing!
And here is a really weird thing that I don't think can be related to Duromine, miracle pill though it is, this morning I could almost do my bra up by myself. I tore my left shoulder years ago and have had several rounds of physio (rarely doing my homework) without getting much change, I could hardly put that arm behind my back at all. I could get my thumb to the small of my back. Well today I can suddenly reach all the way up to my bra, not quite enough reach to do it up yet. Not sure why the sudden improvement, I'm sure I couldn't do that a couple of weeks ago.
I don't know if I was actually hungrier today, but I ate more. 30 calories over my limit! I'm trying not to make a big deal out of that, but I'm a bit disappointed. On the other hand I didn't actually weigh my dinner so maybe I overestimated! We had lots of family over in the afternoon, when I ate some cheese and crackers but did NOT eat a brownie, then casserole and mashed potato when I had more than I really needed. Only two bites of dessert. Two bites too many!
This is our waterfall working! The water looks clearer now too. Sparkling green.
I had an awesome night's sleep last night! At least eight hours of solid sleep, no restlessness or early waking, woke just before seven. Amazing!
And here is a really weird thing that I don't think can be related to Duromine, miracle pill though it is, this morning I could almost do my bra up by myself. I tore my left shoulder years ago and have had several rounds of physio (rarely doing my homework) without getting much change, I could hardly put that arm behind my back at all. I could get my thumb to the small of my back. Well today I can suddenly reach all the way up to my bra, not quite enough reach to do it up yet. Not sure why the sudden improvement, I'm sure I couldn't do that a couple of weeks ago.
I don't know if I was actually hungrier today, but I ate more. 30 calories over my limit! I'm trying not to make a big deal out of that, but I'm a bit disappointed. On the other hand I didn't actually weigh my dinner so maybe I overestimated! We had lots of family over in the afternoon, when I ate some cheese and crackers but did NOT eat a brownie, then casserole and mashed potato when I had more than I really needed. Only two bites of dessert. Two bites too many!
Saturday, August 19, 2017
Handover
Saturday:
Another fairly poor night's sleep, not unusual for me plus see reasons detailed below, but of course the Duromine might have contributed. My weight continues to go down a bit each day which is awesome.
Yesterday before dinner I decided to do some exercise. I already had more than 10,000 steps but my Fitbit wasn't registering me as having done my 30 mins for the day, presumably walking around shopping centres and on gentle hills doesn't get my heartrate up high enough to count. I tried a bit of Just Dance but found it a bit hard on my shoulders, too much arm work (my shoulder pain varies a lot with things other than too much computer - cold weather, being sick, or that time of the month) so I switched to Kinect Adventures. I did a game where you are on a virtual conveyer belt and have to dodge obstacles as they appear. Squat and duck to get under, jump high to get over, dodge from side to side. Really intense exercise. I was puffing and panting, sweating, heart rate up to 150 at one point. Totally normal for my level of fitness.
The thing is, the medication has given me energy and motivation to exercise, but hasn't magically made me fitter or given me extra endurance. So half an hour of that was really tough, and then I realised after my shower how sore my legs were! All the squatting and jumping. I was stiff and sore for the rest of the evening, and it was one of the things that might have kept me awake a bit last night. Sore this morning but better once I started moving around.
Tim's plane home last night was delayed due to the weather - it's still really windy today - and he wasn't going to get home until nearly midnight so I decided to go to bed at my usual time of around 10:30. Just as I was drifting off there was a loud high pitched electronic beep. About 10 seconds later, again. I got up and tracked it down. The smoke alarm was telling me it's battery was low. Every 10 seconds, a horrible screech that echoed around the house. Problem was, even standing on a chair I wasn't even close to reaching it. The kids didn't seem to wake up. I decided to just go back to bed and wait for Tim, but I of course I couldn't sleep. Poor Tim got home after a day that started at 5am, after a long week, and had to deal with that.
A bit of nausea after breakfast again, and worse after lunch. I went for a brisk walk to get some steps in, won't be over 10,000 but should be over my current goal of 7,500.
We spent most of the afternoon with the pool guy here doing the handover. It took two and a half hours! Explaining all the switches and how to balance the pH of the pool and everything. Most of that time Tim and I were standing outside with him, and as the afternoon wore on it got sooooo cold. By the time we came in I was an icicle. BUT it's (nearly) all done. Sort of. We have to spend the week adding more acid slowly, then test again next weekend. Not that we want to swim anyway! We all put our arms in at various times to feel the spa jets or lift the filter and it was so so cold. The water feature looks great, it was getting dark when I took a photo, I'll take a better one tomorrow and post then.
One problem came up though, the heat pump isn't wired up to electricity yet! The plumbing is done but not the electricity. Pretty sure no one told me I had to get that organised. But anyway, I'll call our electrician on Monday. So we still don't know how that is going to sound, or if we need to move it to pacify the neighbours.
You may remember we got a big skip bin two weeks ago for our big clean up. Well it's still sitting out the front. I've talked to the guy three times and he keeps saying he'll pick it up, yesterday he said he would today. But it's still there! What is it with Sydney tradesmen?
And our tiler in the past couple of weeks has promised Monday, then Thursday, now next Wednesday. Sigh.
Oh well, we have a pool with a working light and beautiful waterfall and it looks lovely when I'm not freezing my toes off.
Another fairly poor night's sleep, not unusual for me plus see reasons detailed below, but of course the Duromine might have contributed. My weight continues to go down a bit each day which is awesome.
Yesterday before dinner I decided to do some exercise. I already had more than 10,000 steps but my Fitbit wasn't registering me as having done my 30 mins for the day, presumably walking around shopping centres and on gentle hills doesn't get my heartrate up high enough to count. I tried a bit of Just Dance but found it a bit hard on my shoulders, too much arm work (my shoulder pain varies a lot with things other than too much computer - cold weather, being sick, or that time of the month) so I switched to Kinect Adventures. I did a game where you are on a virtual conveyer belt and have to dodge obstacles as they appear. Squat and duck to get under, jump high to get over, dodge from side to side. Really intense exercise. I was puffing and panting, sweating, heart rate up to 150 at one point. Totally normal for my level of fitness.
The thing is, the medication has given me energy and motivation to exercise, but hasn't magically made me fitter or given me extra endurance. So half an hour of that was really tough, and then I realised after my shower how sore my legs were! All the squatting and jumping. I was stiff and sore for the rest of the evening, and it was one of the things that might have kept me awake a bit last night. Sore this morning but better once I started moving around.
Tim's plane home last night was delayed due to the weather - it's still really windy today - and he wasn't going to get home until nearly midnight so I decided to go to bed at my usual time of around 10:30. Just as I was drifting off there was a loud high pitched electronic beep. About 10 seconds later, again. I got up and tracked it down. The smoke alarm was telling me it's battery was low. Every 10 seconds, a horrible screech that echoed around the house. Problem was, even standing on a chair I wasn't even close to reaching it. The kids didn't seem to wake up. I decided to just go back to bed and wait for Tim, but I of course I couldn't sleep. Poor Tim got home after a day that started at 5am, after a long week, and had to deal with that.
A bit of nausea after breakfast again, and worse after lunch. I went for a brisk walk to get some steps in, won't be over 10,000 but should be over my current goal of 7,500.
We spent most of the afternoon with the pool guy here doing the handover. It took two and a half hours! Explaining all the switches and how to balance the pH of the pool and everything. Most of that time Tim and I were standing outside with him, and as the afternoon wore on it got sooooo cold. By the time we came in I was an icicle. BUT it's (nearly) all done. Sort of. We have to spend the week adding more acid slowly, then test again next weekend. Not that we want to swim anyway! We all put our arms in at various times to feel the spa jets or lift the filter and it was so so cold. The water feature looks great, it was getting dark when I took a photo, I'll take a better one tomorrow and post then.
One problem came up though, the heat pump isn't wired up to electricity yet! The plumbing is done but not the electricity. Pretty sure no one told me I had to get that organised. But anyway, I'll call our electrician on Monday. So we still don't know how that is going to sound, or if we need to move it to pacify the neighbours.
You may remember we got a big skip bin two weeks ago for our big clean up. Well it's still sitting out the front. I've talked to the guy three times and he keeps saying he'll pick it up, yesterday he said he would today. But it's still there! What is it with Sydney tradesmen?
And our tiler in the past couple of weeks has promised Monday, then Thursday, now next Wednesday. Sigh.
Oh well, we have a pool with a working light and beautiful waterfall and it looks lovely when I'm not freezing my toes off.
Thursday, August 17, 2017
Ducks and drums
Friday:
Busy day. I slept poorly last night. The Duromine might have contributed to that, but it's just as likely my silly brain being over-vigilant because Tim had to get up really early for a flight. There was extra stress too, he got a text last night that his flight had been cancelled and he'd been put on a later one, and he called them to see if there was anything earlier and was given the run-around and never actually got confirmation about what flight he was on! Just 'they would call if there was a problem'. So it's typical for me to wake frequently under those circumstances, to check the time.
I felt fine in the morning though, I haven't felt tired at all today. And my jelly legs are back to normal!
I had a full-size breakfast (omelette) then spent the morning out shopping. I went to the further-away big shops to get things I can't get locally -- like mascara that doesn't make my eyes explode, and books -- then grocery shopping. By the time I got home at 1:00 I was starving! I made myself a big stir-fry of vegetables with some cashews and garlic, but only ate about a third of the bowl. It's like my stomach has shrunk, or been stapled. I still get hungry, even ravenous, but a small amount of food satisfies me. The best thing is that when I'm not hungry I'm not obsessing about food or craving junk or sugar. I do still think about food and plan my meals but I'm not being driven to eat all the time just out of boredom or whatever.
Still slight nausea sometimes after eating, and I burp and feel better.
It is dangerously windy here today, driving home there were four lots of branches on the road. I had to change lanes to go around them. Tim's flight was ok getting away, I hope planes are still landing to bring him home again and not too bumpy! I walked up to Aiden's school in the afternoon to see his assembly, it was a bit scary walking under trees, branches dropping everywhere. Maybe I should have worn a bike helmet. But I was determined to get some exercise in.
On the way, almost opposite our house, were a lovely family of ducks.
Busy day. I slept poorly last night. The Duromine might have contributed to that, but it's just as likely my silly brain being over-vigilant because Tim had to get up really early for a flight. There was extra stress too, he got a text last night that his flight had been cancelled and he'd been put on a later one, and he called them to see if there was anything earlier and was given the run-around and never actually got confirmation about what flight he was on! Just 'they would call if there was a problem'. So it's typical for me to wake frequently under those circumstances, to check the time.
I felt fine in the morning though, I haven't felt tired at all today. And my jelly legs are back to normal!
I had a full-size breakfast (omelette) then spent the morning out shopping. I went to the further-away big shops to get things I can't get locally -- like mascara that doesn't make my eyes explode, and books -- then grocery shopping. By the time I got home at 1:00 I was starving! I made myself a big stir-fry of vegetables with some cashews and garlic, but only ate about a third of the bowl. It's like my stomach has shrunk, or been stapled. I still get hungry, even ravenous, but a small amount of food satisfies me. The best thing is that when I'm not hungry I'm not obsessing about food or craving junk or sugar. I do still think about food and plan my meals but I'm not being driven to eat all the time just out of boredom or whatever.
Still slight nausea sometimes after eating, and I burp and feel better.
It is dangerously windy here today, driving home there were four lots of branches on the road. I had to change lanes to go around them. Tim's flight was ok getting away, I hope planes are still landing to bring him home again and not too bumpy! I walked up to Aiden's school in the afternoon to see his assembly, it was a bit scary walking under trees, branches dropping everywhere. Maybe I should have worn a bike helmet. But I was determined to get some exercise in.
On the way, almost opposite our house, were a lovely family of ducks.
Such cute little babies!
I went to assembly because Aiden was playing drums. He's been having lessons before school all year, for some reason they've teamed drums and ukuleles. And for this performance also the choir. He was the only one playing 'real' drums - i.e. a big drum kit, the others were playing little bongos. Or ukuleles, as the case may be. And there were two separate groups of choir/bongos/ukuleles who did one song each, but Aiden stayed on for both! Very exciting. But. I literally couldn't see him at all once they were all on stage. He was at the back, with everyone else standing or sitting in front of him. And he is very little. I could hear him though. I'm very pleased that he was chosen for the more complicated instrument, we are a musical family. It might have helped that we have a drum kit at home! (and three guitars, keyboard, ukulele, accordion, two violins, clarinet...) Not that he ever practises at home, of course. Jasmine hardly ever practices either. And I can't play anything - I only sing!
I had some fruit and yoghurt in the afternoon though I wasn't really hungry yet, and I'll have a nice dinner tonight of small steak and salad. I feel it's going really well. Duromine doesn't magically melt the fat off, but I'm definitely getting hunger suppression with minimal side effects. I do the rest.
I also joined a Dietbet, where you have to lose 4% of your bodyweight in 4 weeks. I find the groups there very supportive. No trolls, just people cheering each other on.
Thursday, July 20, 2017
Bell curve
Friday:
Two weeks ago we were told the pool should be finished over the following two weeks... guess what? No prizes for guessing correctly. Nothing yet. Except the final invoice arrived, to be paid on the day it's finished. I certainly won't be paying before then!
I heard bad-ish news from my TAFE, I was only doing two subjects face-to-face this semester and one of them has been cancelled due to low numbers so I have to do it online along with most of my other subjects which were being taught at times I couldn't get to class. Leaving me with only one face-to-face. As well as being better for learning, I like being there in person for the social aspect! I've made some friends, I get out of the house, I get to interact with adults. Do you know I've spent most of the past 15 years at home, mostly alone or with small children? I'm an introvert so I do like being alone, but not for 15 years. So I'm a bit sad I'll only have one day, one class, with real people.
I was checking online updates to TAFE when I found something curious. My score in the most difficult exam has been changed from 40/50 to 48.5/50! At first I thought a question must have been marked wrong originally but my friend Cathy said her mark has changed from 23 to 37! That is more than one question. I don't know how bell curves work but maybe the whole group struggled so much they changed the grading system?
I saw my exercise physiologist this week and she gave me a whole lot of new resistance exercises to add to my routine, I've been doing pretty well with the walking but not much else. And I saw the dietician again. Kind of pointless because I already have all the information, I know what I should be doing but I just don't do it. But we had a nice chat. I don't plan on seeing her again but I will see the physio in a month (I get 5 subsidised sessions in total, after that I have to pay).
My sleep has been really terrible. I've worn the CPAP again the past two nights (couldn't wear it for a week due to head cold and runny nose), once for four hours (actually asleep maybe half of that) last night kept it on for two hours without being able to get to sleep at all and gave up. I'll keep trying. It's frustrating lying there awake when the stupid thing is supposed to help me sleep. Well, actually it's supposed to keep me breathing while I sleep. I'm trying very hard to look at the machine in a positive way (when it's on), feeding me life-giving oxygen. Like I'm in a stasis pod on a space ship.
Being tired makes me hungry. It's the usual vicious cycle: I'll sleep better when I lose weight and I'll lose weight when I sleep better.
Friday afternoon - weekend time! No plans except the usual family gathering. Should get out in the sunshine again, I'm doing that more.
Two weeks ago we were told the pool should be finished over the following two weeks... guess what? No prizes for guessing correctly. Nothing yet. Except the final invoice arrived, to be paid on the day it's finished. I certainly won't be paying before then!
I heard bad-ish news from my TAFE, I was only doing two subjects face-to-face this semester and one of them has been cancelled due to low numbers so I have to do it online along with most of my other subjects which were being taught at times I couldn't get to class. Leaving me with only one face-to-face. As well as being better for learning, I like being there in person for the social aspect! I've made some friends, I get out of the house, I get to interact with adults. Do you know I've spent most of the past 15 years at home, mostly alone or with small children? I'm an introvert so I do like being alone, but not for 15 years. So I'm a bit sad I'll only have one day, one class, with real people.
I was checking online updates to TAFE when I found something curious. My score in the most difficult exam has been changed from 40/50 to 48.5/50! At first I thought a question must have been marked wrong originally but my friend Cathy said her mark has changed from 23 to 37! That is more than one question. I don't know how bell curves work but maybe the whole group struggled so much they changed the grading system?
I saw my exercise physiologist this week and she gave me a whole lot of new resistance exercises to add to my routine, I've been doing pretty well with the walking but not much else. And I saw the dietician again. Kind of pointless because I already have all the information, I know what I should be doing but I just don't do it. But we had a nice chat. I don't plan on seeing her again but I will see the physio in a month (I get 5 subsidised sessions in total, after that I have to pay).
My sleep has been really terrible. I've worn the CPAP again the past two nights (couldn't wear it for a week due to head cold and runny nose), once for four hours (actually asleep maybe half of that) last night kept it on for two hours without being able to get to sleep at all and gave up. I'll keep trying. It's frustrating lying there awake when the stupid thing is supposed to help me sleep. Well, actually it's supposed to keep me breathing while I sleep. I'm trying very hard to look at the machine in a positive way (when it's on), feeding me life-giving oxygen. Like I'm in a stasis pod on a space ship.
Being tired makes me hungry. It's the usual vicious cycle: I'll sleep better when I lose weight and I'll lose weight when I sleep better.
Friday afternoon - weekend time! No plans except the usual family gathering. Should get out in the sunshine again, I'm doing that more.
Wednesday, October 26, 2016
Neither a borrower nor a lender be
Wednesday:
I felt good yesterday after a good night's sleep, I had a bad night last night so guess what! Feel tired and grumpy and lonely and yuck today. Being well-rested is so important. I didn't make any plans for today because I was expecting the tree guy to call me confirm he was coming back today to finish cleaning up, but no call and no visit so I hung around for nothing.
I did some editing, housework, reading, mooched around. Feel aggrieved over nothing. Hopefully a good night tonight will fix my mood!
I'm re-reading all of Robin Hobb's Fitz and the Fool books (three trilogies, four if you count The Liveship Traders trilogy, and the very last book in the series hopefully soon to be published), this morning I put book one back on the shelf and pulled out book two - and realised book three is missing. So either it was lost in the move, or more likely we lent it to someone and never got it back. In fact now I think about it I'm sure that is the case and I've noticed it missing before but hoped it would turn up. It clearly hasn't and I will have to buy a replacement which is so annoying because the cover art is almost sure not to match the rest of the set, my copy is 20 years old and there will be new editions by now. I don't mind lending people new books but old ones are irreplaceable!
Tim and the kids are all sick with a cold, but still functioning.
I felt good yesterday after a good night's sleep, I had a bad night last night so guess what! Feel tired and grumpy and lonely and yuck today. Being well-rested is so important. I didn't make any plans for today because I was expecting the tree guy to call me confirm he was coming back today to finish cleaning up, but no call and no visit so I hung around for nothing.
I did some editing, housework, reading, mooched around. Feel aggrieved over nothing. Hopefully a good night tonight will fix my mood!
I'm re-reading all of Robin Hobb's Fitz and the Fool books (three trilogies, four if you count The Liveship Traders trilogy, and the very last book in the series hopefully soon to be published), this morning I put book one back on the shelf and pulled out book two - and realised book three is missing. So either it was lost in the move, or more likely we lent it to someone and never got it back. In fact now I think about it I'm sure that is the case and I've noticed it missing before but hoped it would turn up. It clearly hasn't and I will have to buy a replacement which is so annoying because the cover art is almost sure not to match the rest of the set, my copy is 20 years old and there will be new editions by now. I don't mind lending people new books but old ones are irreplaceable!
Tim and the kids are all sick with a cold, but still functioning.
Saturday, October 8, 2016
No sleep
Saturday:
Sometimes I feel like I haven't had a good night's sleep for around 16 years. I had a bad chronic shoulder injury that meant pain for years (I couldn't work or dress myself or pretty much anything) which meant a lot of difficultly sleeping; then as that got better I had two children - the pregnancies then the babies waking during the night - then I injured my other shoulder, sleep apnoea, now I have the pelvic pain and the night sweats. Just let me get some sleep please!
Last night I woke three times with night sweats and pelvic pain. The sweats always seem associated with bad dreams full of negative emotions. Am I really so full of anger and frustration? In the dreams I am often overwhelmed with fury, I shout and swear and even want to physically hurt those I love. Very disturbing, and very hard to shake off when I wake. I've felt like that only a handful of times in my whole waking life, but in my sleep it seems I feel like that all the time now.
Tim was tired too after his week at work so we had a pleasant quiet day at home.
Sometimes I feel like I haven't had a good night's sleep for around 16 years. I had a bad chronic shoulder injury that meant pain for years (I couldn't work or dress myself or pretty much anything) which meant a lot of difficultly sleeping; then as that got better I had two children - the pregnancies then the babies waking during the night - then I injured my other shoulder, sleep apnoea, now I have the pelvic pain and the night sweats. Just let me get some sleep please!
Last night I woke three times with night sweats and pelvic pain. The sweats always seem associated with bad dreams full of negative emotions. Am I really so full of anger and frustration? In the dreams I am often overwhelmed with fury, I shout and swear and even want to physically hurt those I love. Very disturbing, and very hard to shake off when I wake. I've felt like that only a handful of times in my whole waking life, but in my sleep it seems I feel like that all the time now.
Tim was tired too after his week at work so we had a pleasant quiet day at home.
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
Therapist
Wednesday:
I saw the therapist person today. She was nice, but I didn't find the session particularly helpful. I have an appointment to see her again in a fortnight, but I'm not sure if I'll go or not. We basically agreed that mood issues I'm having are probably mainly due to lack of sleep and maybe hormones. I'm seeing the gyno soon/eventually about the hormones. She had a couple of suggestions about sleep but I don't know if I will use any of them.
Firstly she has a deep breathing technique to use when going to sleep; in through the nose, hold for as long as possible (she demonstrated about 20 seconds which is a long time), then out through the mouth. So for starters, I can't open my mouth while I have a CPAP on (if I use it, which I told her I was, I didn't go into the fact I'm actually sleeping better without it because I didn't want a lecture but I did say I only wear it for a few hours and why, which is true when I am using it) so I can't do that. She suggested trying in and out through the nose. But isn't holding my breath so long the opposite of what the CPAP is trying to achieve? If I want that effect I can just leave off the CPAP and let my sleep apnoea deprive my brain of oxygen without the effort.
Secondly she suggested getting Melatonin, it can help restore sleep patterns. I've heard of that before, but I looked it up after the session and it seems to be contra-indicated in sleep apnoea because it can relax the muscles too much. Also it can make depression (and diabetes) worse. The site I looked at said over and over to only take with doctor supervision. So I am not trying that without checking with my GP first, I don't know what qualifications the therapist has. She didn't have "Dr" in front of her name.
And thirdly St John's Wort, a herbal medication, is something she's had success with. But she wasn't suggesting that right away, maybe later. And when I looked it up, it can interfere with a lot of medication, including birth control. So, again, not something I would take without checking with my GP.
The other thing she suggested was me getting out and meeting people more. She pushed yoga, which I have no interest in, but I countered with Tai Chi which I've wanted to try for a while. I did try to contact one place at the start of the year but they never got back to me and I didn't follow it up. Oh, and she suggested seeing a podiatrist about my foot since it was preventing me getting out and about or exercising. I'm giving this treatment a couple more days, then I think I will, it was one of the options I've planned to try.
Overall it was quite a pleasant chat but no new information and I think she talked more than I did so it wasn't like the sessions you see on TV where they get you to talk about your childhood. It was all her giving advice.
I saw the therapist person today. She was nice, but I didn't find the session particularly helpful. I have an appointment to see her again in a fortnight, but I'm not sure if I'll go or not. We basically agreed that mood issues I'm having are probably mainly due to lack of sleep and maybe hormones. I'm seeing the gyno soon/eventually about the hormones. She had a couple of suggestions about sleep but I don't know if I will use any of them.
Firstly she has a deep breathing technique to use when going to sleep; in through the nose, hold for as long as possible (she demonstrated about 20 seconds which is a long time), then out through the mouth. So for starters, I can't open my mouth while I have a CPAP on (if I use it, which I told her I was, I didn't go into the fact I'm actually sleeping better without it because I didn't want a lecture but I did say I only wear it for a few hours and why, which is true when I am using it) so I can't do that. She suggested trying in and out through the nose. But isn't holding my breath so long the opposite of what the CPAP is trying to achieve? If I want that effect I can just leave off the CPAP and let my sleep apnoea deprive my brain of oxygen without the effort.
Secondly she suggested getting Melatonin, it can help restore sleep patterns. I've heard of that before, but I looked it up after the session and it seems to be contra-indicated in sleep apnoea because it can relax the muscles too much. Also it can make depression (and diabetes) worse. The site I looked at said over and over to only take with doctor supervision. So I am not trying that without checking with my GP first, I don't know what qualifications the therapist has. She didn't have "Dr" in front of her name.
And thirdly St John's Wort, a herbal medication, is something she's had success with. But she wasn't suggesting that right away, maybe later. And when I looked it up, it can interfere with a lot of medication, including birth control. So, again, not something I would take without checking with my GP.
The other thing she suggested was me getting out and meeting people more. She pushed yoga, which I have no interest in, but I countered with Tai Chi which I've wanted to try for a while. I did try to contact one place at the start of the year but they never got back to me and I didn't follow it up. Oh, and she suggested seeing a podiatrist about my foot since it was preventing me getting out and about or exercising. I'm giving this treatment a couple more days, then I think I will, it was one of the options I've planned to try.
Overall it was quite a pleasant chat but no new information and I think she talked more than I did so it wasn't like the sessions you see on TV where they get you to talk about your childhood. It was all her giving advice.
Tuesday, June 7, 2016
Hungry
Tuesday:
Another good night of sleep. Sleep is awesome!
I had to get Aiden a new sports uniform and decided my foot would be fine for me to walk up to the school. I was so wrong. Limped home 45 mins later after what should have been a 25 min round trip.
I'm writing this as I wait for my dinner. I had to go pick up Jasmine from a friend's house right in the middle of roasting a chicken, I turned the oven off while out. So now I am very hungry smelling delicious lemony chicken that isn't cooked yet. I am very much looking forward to it.
Tomorrow I see the counsellor therapist person. That will be interesting. They called today to confirm the appointment and ask if I could come at 3pm instead, which I couldn't because I have children coming home from school. 1pm it is.
I feel like I'm progressing well with my book. If you're not up to speed with my writing adventures, I spent a bit over a year writing my first novel (after many false starts throughout my life, it has been my ambition forever). Then I got a group of writers to critique it at the start of last year. That was very confronting, but after I recovered I agreed with most of what they said. Then my mother died. Then my father died. Then we moved house. Basically I didn't touch my novel for a year. But the editing/rewriting process is going smoothly now. I'm sure there will be another round of improvements after this, but I'm getting there. I want it to be the best (first) book I can write before I offer it for publication. It's fantasy fiction, with dragons and magic and shipwreck and minotaurs. This is a long process, but that is pretty normal especially for a first book.
Another good night of sleep. Sleep is awesome!
I had to get Aiden a new sports uniform and decided my foot would be fine for me to walk up to the school. I was so wrong. Limped home 45 mins later after what should have been a 25 min round trip.
I'm writing this as I wait for my dinner. I had to go pick up Jasmine from a friend's house right in the middle of roasting a chicken, I turned the oven off while out. So now I am very hungry smelling delicious lemony chicken that isn't cooked yet. I am very much looking forward to it.
Tomorrow I see the counsellor therapist person. That will be interesting. They called today to confirm the appointment and ask if I could come at 3pm instead, which I couldn't because I have children coming home from school. 1pm it is.
I feel like I'm progressing well with my book. If you're not up to speed with my writing adventures, I spent a bit over a year writing my first novel (after many false starts throughout my life, it has been my ambition forever). Then I got a group of writers to critique it at the start of last year. That was very confronting, but after I recovered I agreed with most of what they said. Then my mother died. Then my father died. Then we moved house. Basically I didn't touch my novel for a year. But the editing/rewriting process is going smoothly now. I'm sure there will be another round of improvements after this, but I'm getting there. I want it to be the best (first) book I can write before I offer it for publication. It's fantasy fiction, with dragons and magic and shipwreck and minotaurs. This is a long process, but that is pretty normal especially for a first book.
Monday, June 6, 2016
Wild weather
Monday:
There was 3 cm of water inside our older car that was parked in the street during the downpour all weekend. Tim's father's house leaked and they had a little river running across the floor. Houses were evacuated in my brother's suburb (but he is up a hill). Crazy wild weather! At least we know this house is rainproof! Gloomy and cold but not raining this morning so the kids went to school as usual, I had been considering keeping them at home if it was bad. Jasmine's high school is a series of separate buildings that she would have to run between from class to class.
I weighed 81.4 kg this morning, much the same (slightly down) as last week.
Since my sleep has been much worse since starting to use my CPAP again, I didn't use it last night. In the past, it's taken me a few nights to get used to the CPAP but then it's got better. Not this time. Every night I would lie awake for a couple of hours, sleep an hour or two at most, then wake and claw it off. Noisy, sweaty, uncomfortable. And I was feeling so tired every day. The point of it is to help me sleep better! Without it last night, I still lay awake for a while. As soon as my head hit the pillow it was full of regrets about the past, worries from the present, and fears for the future. I tossed and turned. But at last I got to sleep and had a much better night. I felt quite good today. My doctor won't be happy with me but I don't see how less sleep is the better option.
There was 3 cm of water inside our older car that was parked in the street during the downpour all weekend. Tim's father's house leaked and they had a little river running across the floor. Houses were evacuated in my brother's suburb (but he is up a hill). Crazy wild weather! At least we know this house is rainproof! Gloomy and cold but not raining this morning so the kids went to school as usual, I had been considering keeping them at home if it was bad. Jasmine's high school is a series of separate buildings that she would have to run between from class to class.
I weighed 81.4 kg this morning, much the same (slightly down) as last week.
Since my sleep has been much worse since starting to use my CPAP again, I didn't use it last night. In the past, it's taken me a few nights to get used to the CPAP but then it's got better. Not this time. Every night I would lie awake for a couple of hours, sleep an hour or two at most, then wake and claw it off. Noisy, sweaty, uncomfortable. And I was feeling so tired every day. The point of it is to help me sleep better! Without it last night, I still lay awake for a while. As soon as my head hit the pillow it was full of regrets about the past, worries from the present, and fears for the future. I tossed and turned. But at last I got to sleep and had a much better night. I felt quite good today. My doctor won't be happy with me but I don't see how less sleep is the better option.
Sunday, June 5, 2016
Weekend
Sunday:
It has been absolutely bucketing down all weekend, really heavy rain and windy too. So it's definitely been an indoor couple of days. It's so dark it feels like evening even in the middle of the day. This is not a well- lit house at all, we have plans to change the lights and also add a window looking out into the backyard. What seemed quite cosy and welcoming in summer might be rather gloomy in winter. We want to get solar panels fitted on the roof and I have no idea if I need to do that before or after changing all the light fittings. Something to investigate, when I have the energy.
Yesterday and today a lot of time was spent (by Tim and the kids) working on Jasmine's science experiment. She set up a long (can't think of the word) thing in her room where she put a book in a basket which made the basket sink and the other end string pulled something up that knocked over a chain of books that made a pair of scissors cut a string that made a marble roll into a chain of dominos which knocked a spoonful of ice cream into a glass of fizzy drink, creating what we call a "spider" in Australia. They filmed take after take while things didn't go quite perfectly, but eventually it worked.
Yesterday evening we watched the first "The Hobbit" movie which we decided the kids were old enough to see. Five more to go in the franchise! They both loved it.
I continue to get terrible sleep for all the reasons previously stated. I am getting to the end of my ability to cope with this, which means tears and snapping at people. Not sure what I can do about it. I am turning to food for energy and I don't see that changing any time soon and I'm not apologising for it. Whatever gets me through the day, at the moment. If I can at least get this pelvic pain sorted, that will help with the second half of every night. But that appointment is still weeks away. I am reconsidering that decision to stick with the closer gyno, I might at least ring around on Monday to see when I could get appointments elsewhere.
It has been absolutely bucketing down all weekend, really heavy rain and windy too. So it's definitely been an indoor couple of days. It's so dark it feels like evening even in the middle of the day. This is not a well- lit house at all, we have plans to change the lights and also add a window looking out into the backyard. What seemed quite cosy and welcoming in summer might be rather gloomy in winter. We want to get solar panels fitted on the roof and I have no idea if I need to do that before or after changing all the light fittings. Something to investigate, when I have the energy.
Yesterday and today a lot of time was spent (by Tim and the kids) working on Jasmine's science experiment. She set up a long (can't think of the word) thing in her room where she put a book in a basket which made the basket sink and the other end string pulled something up that knocked over a chain of books that made a pair of scissors cut a string that made a marble roll into a chain of dominos which knocked a spoonful of ice cream into a glass of fizzy drink, creating what we call a "spider" in Australia. They filmed take after take while things didn't go quite perfectly, but eventually it worked.
Yesterday evening we watched the first "The Hobbit" movie which we decided the kids were old enough to see. Five more to go in the franchise! They both loved it.
I continue to get terrible sleep for all the reasons previously stated. I am getting to the end of my ability to cope with this, which means tears and snapping at people. Not sure what I can do about it. I am turning to food for energy and I don't see that changing any time soon and I'm not apologising for it. Whatever gets me through the day, at the moment. If I can at least get this pelvic pain sorted, that will help with the second half of every night. But that appointment is still weeks away. I am reconsidering that decision to stick with the closer gyno, I might at least ring around on Monday to see when I could get appointments elsewhere.
Friday, June 3, 2016
Gargling paint
Friday:
Another bad night (indigestion, night sweats, Tim snoring like he was gargling paint, and pelvic pain) but I had a nap in the afternoon and that got me through the day. I didn't get much done though, except the grocery shopping.
Hmm, nothing else to say today. Have a lovely weekend!
Another bad night (indigestion, night sweats, Tim snoring like he was gargling paint, and pelvic pain) but I had a nap in the afternoon and that got me through the day. I didn't get much done though, except the grocery shopping.
Hmm, nothing else to say today. Have a lovely weekend!
Wednesday, June 1, 2016
Winter
Wednesday:
First day of winter!
I had a better sleep last night (I think). I kept the CPAP on for 4.5 hours, only slightly more than the night before, but I did feel I slept more of the night. The CPAP still made my nose sweaty and itchy but not sore like the first night. Got to lose this weight so I don't have to use it any more!
I ate well today, except I got a bit impatient for dinner and ate a big hunk of cheese. But no junk food. My plan is to eat clean all through June. One month at a time.
First day of winter!
I had a better sleep last night (I think). I kept the CPAP on for 4.5 hours, only slightly more than the night before, but I did feel I slept more of the night. The CPAP still made my nose sweaty and itchy but not sore like the first night. Got to lose this weight so I don't have to use it any more!
I ate well today, except I got a bit impatient for dinner and ate a big hunk of cheese. But no junk food. My plan is to eat clean all through June. One month at a time.
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
CPAP
Tuesday:
I felt like I had the worst night's sleep ever. I tried to use my CPAP (machine to combat sleep apnoea) and lay awake for four hours, with the noisy machine and my sweaty face stopping me sleeping. Finally took the CPAP off, then was kept awake the rest of the night by Tim and his asthmatic breathing. And then he gets up an hour earlier than me and getting ready for work today seemed unusually noisy. I felt like I didn't sleep at all.
Except I must have, because as usual I can remember my dreams, specifically before I took the CPAP off. And today I felt much less exhausted and cranky than yesterday. I guess it's worth giving the CPAP another try tonight.
I felt like I had the worst night's sleep ever. I tried to use my CPAP (machine to combat sleep apnoea) and lay awake for four hours, with the noisy machine and my sweaty face stopping me sleeping. Finally took the CPAP off, then was kept awake the rest of the night by Tim and his asthmatic breathing. And then he gets up an hour earlier than me and getting ready for work today seemed unusually noisy. I felt like I didn't sleep at all.
Except I must have, because as usual I can remember my dreams, specifically before I took the CPAP off. And today I felt much less exhausted and cranky than yesterday. I guess it's worth giving the CPAP another try tonight.
Monday, May 30, 2016
Weight up
Monday:
This morning I weighed 81.6 kg, up 2.1 kg from last Monday. So slow to leave, so quick to come back.
I've had two nights in a row of poor sleep due to pelvic pain. I think I will try to find a gyno who can see me sooner than two months away. Last night I tossed and turned, and when I did sleep I dreamed I was trying to sleep on a hard floor! Very tired and grumpy and headachy today. I'm always on the edge of insufficient sleep anyway, so two extra bad nights affects me a lot. I fell asleep sitting up in the afternoon, but only for about 10 minutes as the kids were home talking to me.
I thought my book club was tomorrow, but now I'm pretty sure it was last Tuesday and I missed it. 4th Tuesday of the month. Damn. The book was "The Palace of Tears" can't remember the author (Australian). I don't read a lot of what you might call modern fiction, I usually read fantasy genre or classics, and I'm enjoying expanding my repertoire but it's a shame missing out on the human interaction that I joined the group for. I've marked the next date in my diary this time. Next month it's "The Dressmaker" which they recently made a movie of, but you wouldn't have heard of it unless you're Australian.
Everything I want to talk about today: pain here, pain there, tantruming toddler in supermarket, Foxtel crashing just as Game of Thrones started, long list of tasks I didn't get done... is pretty negative so lets just say I struggled to cope a bit today and leave it at that. I got through the day.
This morning I weighed 81.6 kg, up 2.1 kg from last Monday. So slow to leave, so quick to come back.
I've had two nights in a row of poor sleep due to pelvic pain. I think I will try to find a gyno who can see me sooner than two months away. Last night I tossed and turned, and when I did sleep I dreamed I was trying to sleep on a hard floor! Very tired and grumpy and headachy today. I'm always on the edge of insufficient sleep anyway, so two extra bad nights affects me a lot. I fell asleep sitting up in the afternoon, but only for about 10 minutes as the kids were home talking to me.
I thought my book club was tomorrow, but now I'm pretty sure it was last Tuesday and I missed it. 4th Tuesday of the month. Damn. The book was "The Palace of Tears" can't remember the author (Australian). I don't read a lot of what you might call modern fiction, I usually read fantasy genre or classics, and I'm enjoying expanding my repertoire but it's a shame missing out on the human interaction that I joined the group for. I've marked the next date in my diary this time. Next month it's "The Dressmaker" which they recently made a movie of, but you wouldn't have heard of it unless you're Australian.
Everything I want to talk about today: pain here, pain there, tantruming toddler in supermarket, Foxtel crashing just as Game of Thrones started, long list of tasks I didn't get done... is pretty negative so lets just say I struggled to cope a bit today and leave it at that. I got through the day.
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