Lost in the ether

Thursday:

I'm upset right now, although starting to get some perspective. Usually I only write about an hour a day but I was really fired up with inspiration, getting close to the end of my manuscript. I worked on my novel all day over three sessions. The third session was in an earlier section that I'd only roughed out yesterday, so I didn't notice until the end that all the work I had done in the second session was gone. Just not there.

I am as certain as I can be - say 95% - that I saved it and copied it over to my USB as I always do for backup. When I went to copy it I couldn't see the USB on my desk then realised it was still plugged in from earlier. I remember that moment. Hard to be wrong about it.

Unless I didn't save it, closed the document, and copied over the same document I'd copied earlier in the day without the new work? Wouldn't it ask me if I wanted to close without saving?

I should be telling myself it's no big deal. It was only about an hour and a half of work, what is that in the scheme of things? But it was a very emotional scene, basically a main character offering to sacrifice his life for everyone else. I'll never write it again the same way. Maybe better. But not the same.

I feel all empty inside and yuck and sad. I worked so hard today. Gone.

Not all gone. A third gone. Feels like all gone.