Friday, March 4, 2016

Public property


When I started this blog it was a high-tech version of the hand-written journals I'd been keeping on and off since I was a teenager. Talking about what I'd done that day, how I was feeling. Written for me, although it was exciting to get readers and comments.

My husband started reading it, which I both liked and didn't like. It meant I couldn't say anything negative about him (he's lovely, but everyone is irritating at some point) but also it made me conscious all the time that someone I knew in real life was going to read it, and that was a bit inhibiting.

And also, a couple of times he suggested I edit posts where I'd said things about our children or neighbours, because what if they read it one day? So I stopped talking about the people in my life except in the most banal way. Nothing too personal. Nothing that was meaningful.

But I could still talk about myself, right? About how I was feeling.

A couple of posts ago I got a comment that I was being a bit whiney. To suck it up and stop complaining so much. I do vent a lot here - I mistakenly thought it was my personal space where I could do so without offending anyone - it seemed a better option than always whining to my family who aren't allowed to walk away or ignore me.

I guess I was wrong. I was wrong the whole time. This is public property, and everyone from my husband to complete strangers get to decide what I can and cannot write about.


  1. Natalie, in my opinion, this is your blog and you can write and share whatever you want. And if you want to whine and complain and jump up and down...that's your prerogative. No one has a say in that, and if they don't like it, they can click the back button and go back where they came from. Or then can start their own blog and maintain it the way they like!

    Okay, on a lighter note, all that to say that you shouldn't apologize or explain to anyone. This is your blog, girl. Blog away!

    And I hadn't seen the post that included the comment about you whining, so I went back to find it. And lo and behold, there it is. There's always someone who has to up someone else. Their life is more difficult, more tiresome, more frustrating...blah, blah, blah...and if you don't reach that level you have no right to complain. Nonsense. We all have our own struggles and handle their in our own way. And if something is easy for someone else and more difficult for you, that's how things are. So don't explain and don't apologize, Natalie. Just share your thoughts and ignore these people. There will always be self righteous people waving their finger at someone. I enjoy your blog and the thoughts you share.

    1. Sorry about all the typos along the way. I type very fast and even faster when I'm irritated, which produces errors! :)

  2. Thanks Martha. I do worry that I complain a lot, considering I have a wonderful life, but this is where I vent all my day to day problems that everyone has.

  3. I read the comment and decided to respond to it on your behalf but when I returned to do so you had already replied and I thought I should stay out of it in order to avoid some sort of escalation. I know I would have been very hurt by that comment and I hoped you were able to move on unscathed, your response was very good. Try not to feel censored on your OWN blog, say what you want and please don't think you are unappreciated, I love reading what you have to say and really miss you on the days you don't post. Take care Blods xxxx

    1. Thanks Blods. I'm not keen on escalation or confrontation either and waited a few days but decided I did want to respond to it.

  4. Its your blog, do and say what you need to say…sometimes we do vent and need a place to do it.
    I too enjoy your blog and your thoughts.