Chemistry

Thursday:

This afternoon I went in to uni and put in my application for a Bachelor of Human Nutrition. I should hear within a week whether I got in (I can't see any reason why I wouldn't). I'm still pretty unsure about the whole thing. I love study, but it sounds like a huge investment of time and hard work too, for uncertain benefit. I didn't even like Chemistry in High School (although I believe that was due to a terrible teacher) and it's the first subject I have to do. What if I don't shine? The school year starts at the beginning of Feb, and I have a few weeks after that to withdraw without paying any fees so I don't really have to decide, now that I've got my application in.

Cost is another factor. We have a deferred payment scheme here for uni, you don't have to pay anything until you start to earn a certain amout of money per annum, but it's still thousands of dollars in the end. And in the meantime there are other costs like textbooks. We can afford it, but I would hate to feel like I have wasted a lot of time and money if it doesn't lead anywhere.

My husband and I both agreed that I would stay home and look after the children when they were little, he earned a lot more than me and my RSI was starting to get really bad at that stage so it was a good time for me to quit my job. But now the kids are older (9 and 7) and I feel like I should start contributing some money to the household. I'm feeling guilty about that, and worried about the continuing problems of my RSI, and just generally uncertain. But Tim says he's happy for me to go and do more study.

It was another day that I thought would be relaxed but turned out to be quite busy (but both more productive and more enjoyable than yesterday). In the morning a friend/work contact called (she got me the public service job earlier this year) and asked me to come to a nearby café for a chat. The last two times she called I wasn't able to, so it was important I went today or she might think I was avoiding her. Tim had the car so I walked to the café. I was quite hungry but didn't want something sweet (they have beautiful looking cakes at this café but I never seem to be there at a good time to have one!) and she suggested we share a breakfast. I thought this a slightly odd suggestion for non-family but agreed to it and we got bacon & poached eggs and divided it onto two plates. It was very nice and a great idea to share - I didn't even quite finish my half!

We talked for an hour then I walked home again - she offered me a lift both ways but I walked to get a little exercise in - and it was starting to get really hot. I did a bit of reading for the comp I'm judging and had lunch then my husband brought the car home for me (he'd been at a different work location than usual) and rode his bike in to his normal office. I had to go into uni in person because their system wouldn't let me apply online - I was caught between "you've been to this uni before so you have to use your old details" and "you are not currently a student so you can't use your old details". It was one of the more frustrating things yesterday that I spent a lot of time on both online and over the phone.

I was at this uni in 2009 for my Grad Cert, but since then they have changed the whole parking system and I could no longer get in to the first two parking areas I went to. I ended up parking on the street and walking some distance. Then I couldn't find the Student Centre and wandered around a bit. After putting in my application I went over to look at the buildings I would be in, at the opposite end of the uni to where I was last time because that was Arts and this is Science. I had thought of having a chat to someone about career prospects if there was anyone around, but then I had a drink from a bubbler and got water all down my front so I was feeling rather less inclined to seek out a future teacher. Walked all the way back to the car which was now an oven and picked up kids from school, feeling a bit wiped out from the heat. Really stinky hot day.

I need to work out how I am going to keep writing during school holidays. Aiden likes me to pay attention to him when he is home so I struggle to concentrate on writing when he is not at school. And the kids deserve my attention, of course. But don't want to put the novel aside for six weeks over summer! And there have been quite a few days like yesterday and today when I haven't got any writing done before they get home. I need something to distract them with.