Thursday, June 12, 2014

Week three weigh in

Thursday:

Week three weigh-in!

Starting weight: 85.3 kg
Last week: 83.1 kg
This week: 82.9 kg
Loss this week: 0.2 kg
Total loss: 2.4 kg

Considering the extra treats I had this week, I am happy with any kind of loss. The line on the graph is still going down! And I am under 83 again which feels significant for me because it was my "highest ever" for a while before it went up even more. Next goal is 80! Then after that it will be 75, which I am looking forward to even more than eventually reaching goal weight, because a couple of times in the past on the way up 76 was the point where I went from feeling a bit overweight to really starting to hate the way my body looked. Getting back under that will be awesome. Anyway, for today I celebrate being under 83 again.

I took Thor to the vet today because the paperwork I had said he was due for his next vaccination, although I thought the breeder said not for another two weeks. And it's not for another two weeks. Don't know why the previous vet put that date, only two weeks after the last shot, maybe just a mistake. So that was a waste of $56. She gave him a check-up though and everything is good. And told me the schedule for worming him. But he'll get his vaccination in two weeks and then still can't associate with other dogs or go to the park for two weeks after that! Another month stuck at home. So definitely need to get my exercise sorted.

At lunchtime today I put Thor outside with a chicken neck to gnaw on and he was happy with that for well over half an hour while I had my own lunch inside then came out with a cup of tea. So I might use that time to go for a walk tomorrow. I probably worry too much about him stressing if left alone. I have been out for short errands of 45 mins or so a couple of times, leaving him locked in the bathroom which is where his night-time crate is, and come home to find him not in his bed but sleeping in the little clothes basket on my dirty socks. I don't think he was too bothered, and he certainly didn't mind being left outside for a little while with food today. I'm the one who stresses. I'll build up the time alone slowly, for my sake if not his!

I bought some index cards today. The very first thing you are supposed to do for the Beck Diet Solution is to write down all the reasons you want to lose weight and then read your cards a couple of times a day (there are other things to put on index cards later, too). I never did that exactly as ordered. I made myself a trio of keywords that I could easily remember and then thought about them occasionally... But I am so happy with this cognitive therapy stuff that I am going to go back and do it exactly as Beck recommends.

My keywords, by the way, were Sleep, Mirror and Christmas. "Sleep" because I hate that I have to wear a machine to bed so I don't stop breathing while I'm asleep. I want to beat sleep apnoea. This keyword concept expands to health in general - improving my insulin resistance so I'm not pre-diabetic anymore, being able to be more active without being tired, taking pressure off my joints. "Mirror" refers to how I feel about my appearance, when I look in the mirror, when I try on new clothes, when I catch a glimpse of myself in a shop window. And "Christmas" is about how I think others see me and maybe judge me. I see my mother's side of the family only for things like weddings, and every second Christmas. They are all slender and fit. I have three aunts in their 60s who are upright and trim and could beat me in any sporting contest you'd care to name. Every time this second Christmas approaches I plan to lose weight so I won't be the only fat one there anymore, and every time I fail and just get fatter. I care about lots of other people's opinions of me (my husband, for instance!) but that keyword "Christmas" reminds me how awkward and inadequate I feel at that time of year. The three keywords are in order of importance to me and could be relabelled something like Health, Self-Esteem and Appearance.

Stuck to the plan today and I have plenty of calories left for my yoghurt and fruit supper.

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